


For the Wrong Reasons

by Pll162



Category: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
Genre: Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Jealous Simon, M/M, Mutual Pining, Oblivious Simon Snow, POV Simon Snow, POV Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch, Slow Burn, Tired Tyrannus Basilton "Baz" Pitch
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-01
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2020-07-29 01:17:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 33,216
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20073745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pll162/pseuds/Pll162
Summary: Baz is tired. And done. He’s just spent 6 weeks in a coffin, for Crowley’s sake, and he thinks he deserves some peace. He just wants to get through 8th year as normally as he can, and maybe even enjoy it, maybe even date someone so he can distract himself from his unrequited feelings for Snow. And then Simon Snow can drive a stake through his heart at the end of the year and live his destiny. But like always, he never gets what he wants.





	1. Chapter 1

Simon 

Baz has been missing for nearly 6 weeks, and I am on the verge of going insane.

He usually arrives a few days after I do, so I didn’t think much of it when I first got here. But then classes began, and he still hadn’t shown up. When I talked about it with Penny, she suggested that maybe his family has pulled him out because of the war, like what was happening to others kids belonging to the Old Families. 

But I know Baz, and he never would just skip 8th year, even if it was optional. He cares too much about beating Penny and being top of the class. And if not for academics, he would surely just stay at Watford to torment me, that prat. 

  
  


I know there must be another reason he didn’t return (most likely that he was plotting something), but I couldn’t find any information. I followed Dev and Niall around for a bit, but they seemed to know nothing, or acted like it. I tried looking through his side of the room for evidence of plotting, and found nothing. Penny argued that that was a major violation of privacy, but I think that if Baz was plotting something it was my right to know as his arch-nemesis. I even searched the entirety of the Catacombs, to see if maybe Baz was hiding out there, but again I found nothing.

  
  


Days past by, and nobody seemed to care that he still hadn’t returned. His name wasn’t called for attendance anymore, there was no news from his family about his whereabouts, and Penny began to cover up her ears every time I tried to bring him up. “I can’t listen to you talk about him anymore Simon,” she said, exasperated. “You’ve reached your Baz conversation limit for a decade.”

  
  


It doesn’t help that I have nothing else to distract me. The Mage isn’t at Watford to give me any instructions, and Agatha has decided that we’re on another break.

“I just need some time to myself, Simon,” Agatha had said to me. “I need to figure out things, and it would be good for us to spend some time apart.”

  
  


I tried to understand, I really did. But Agatha and I were  _ meant  _ to end up together. After the war, we would get married and start a family. It was destiny, and I don’t know why she was trying to ruin it all. I had a feeling it had something to do with Baz, but I think if I brought it up it would only make things worse.

  
  


You see? Baz isn’t even here and he’s destroying everything. He’s the reason my relationship is failing, and I’ve spent so much time looking for him my grades are suffering. I can’t sleep either, knowing he’s out there, plotting. Maybe this is his plan. He wants me to drive myself insane wondering what he’s doing, while he’s probably relaxing at his home, getting entail from his minions and laughing at me. That sounds just like him.

  
  


If he thinks he’s gonna win, he’s wrong. I’m not gonna let that git ruin my life. No way. I’m gonna stop worrying and focus on me, and try to fix things with Agatha, so everything can go back to normal.

* * *

I failed. Baz is stilling getting to me. Agatha barely speaks to me anymore, and doesn’t sit with me and Penny at meals. My grades have somehow gotten worse, and so have my sleeping habits. I can barely smell him in our room anywhere. It’s like the room is forgetting that Baz is gone too. 

“Stop it, Simon.” 

Penny’s glaring at me from across the table, for whatever bloody reason. 

“What? I wasn’t doing anything.”

“You’re clearly thinking about Baz, seeing that you have a foul look on your face, and your magic is leaking.”

“Oh.” She’s right. I can see some of the other students looking sick, and I’m guessing it’s because of my magic. I try to calm down so my magic would stay under control, but that all goes up in the air when the doors fly open.

I jump up, knocking over my chair. Penny tries to hiss at me to sit and relax, but I can’t. 

Because guess who’s just walked in, acting as if everything is fine and that returning after a 6-week disappearance is an everyday ordeal?

Baz.

  
  



	2. Chapter 2

Baz

Fine. It was a bit dramatic of me to cast  ** _Open Sesame _ ** on the doors, though it can’t be considered out of character. I’ve been known to make grand entrances.

I hear a chair falling over, and it can only belong to one person. Snow. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see Bunce trying to calm him. Wellbelove doesn’t seem to present amongst them. 

Interesting. Were the golden couple going through hard times? 

No. I shouldn’t let myself hope. It’ll only end up hurting me. 

Then again, I am a masochist.

People have begun whispering and pointing. I sneer at the people who stare at me as I walk towards my usual table. Dev and Niall have bored expressions on their face, and are barely paying attention to the scene around them. Good men.

I refuse to make eye contact with Snow, but I can feel his magic growing by the second. I think I’ve pissed him off, just by my presence. He’s probably angry that I wasn’t dead like he must have hoped. Good. That twat had 6 long weeks of peace, while I slowly faded away in a coffin until Fiona found me. 

“Gentlemen,” I say, as I sit. Both of them give me a brief nod, and resume their conversation about football, as if I’ve arrived a few minutes late to breakfast, instead of weeks.

I finally allow myself to turn towards Snow. I expect him to look agitated and ready to fight, so I have a sneer ready for him. Instead I’m greeted with a mix of concern and something else that I can’t figure out on his face. I’m caught off guard for a second, and the sneer drops. 

He looks like he wants to say something to me. I quickly turn around before he can get the words out. I’m not in the mood for the plotting accusations. I’m too tired. Even though my father and Fiona forced me to rest for a few days, it didn’t help. My leg still felt off, and no matter how much I slept, I still felt like shite.

I don’t bother to eat anything. I just sit and zone in and out of whatever Dev and Niall are talking about, trying to act normal. 

Like I just hadn’t spent 6 weeks locked in a coffin, surviving solely on blood.

After I got kidnapped by numpties.  _ Fucking numpties.  _ They were about as intelligent as Snow, and communicated in even fewer words than him. I didn’t think that it was possible. It was embarrassing, honestly. And I want to forget about, and return to normal life. At least, what can be considered normal for a gay teen vampire in love with his arch-nemesis.

That was the goal for this year. Normality. I know the Old Families want me to spy on the Mage and prepare to fight Snow, but I don’t want to. I know I won’t be able to kill him so why try to prepare? 

I’m fucking done. With the war, the Humdrum, the Mage, everything. The kidnapping was the final straw for me. I nearly went insane. The fact that nobody manage to find me for  _ weeks  _ still angers me. I’m also almost completely sure that the whole ordeal was the Mage’s doing. So fuck it all, I’m done.

The only thing that kept me going was the thought of Simon Snow, and how he was so  _ alive _ . When I would close my eyes, I could only see him, and if I tried hard enough, I could pretend that I was back in our room, and I was just across from him, instead of wasting away in a coffin. So in an extremely ironic way, I guess I owe him for saving me. He still manages to be the hero and save the day, even if he doesn’t know it.

He’s so full of life, full of chaotic good and courage. 

Simon Snow is everything I want. But he doesn’t want me, nor will he ever. He wants a future with Wellbelove, with a litter of shiny haired children. 

And I wasn’t going to get in the way. The more I try to push him, try to get a reaction from him, the more time I spend around him, it’ll only hurt more when he chooses his golden path and finally goes to off me. 

So I’ll finish this year at the top of my class, and try to enjoy myself. I’m gonna ignore Snow, and his pretty girlfriend and let them be. And when the time comes, Snow will kill me, and I’ll finally fulfill my role as the tragic enemy.

* * *

Simon

I can’t believe it. Baz is back.  _ Baz is back.  _ He seems to be acting like the pretentious arse he is, but something isn’t right. His skin looks grayer than usual, and when he walked, there seemed to be something wrong with one of his legs. I think he’s trying to put an intimidating expression on his face, but he just looks tired. He’s also gotten thinner. He’s still fit, mind you, but I can see his collarbones stabbing out of his shirt.

I have so many questions. I want to drag him up to our room, and ask him each one. I don’t want him out of my sight. He’s been gone for far too long, and clearly hasn’t taken care of himself. He was probably too busy plotting to care. Yeah, that must be it.

I also have to tell him about the Visiting, about his mother.

I have no idea how to bring it up, and how to tell him in a way that won’t upset him. Maybe I should just be blunt.  _ Hey Baz, I know you’ve been gone for weeks, and guess who visited me while you were gone? Your mother, isn’t that funny? Also, she wants you to avenge her death. _

Yeah, there has to be a different way to do that.

I see Baz get up, and walk out. He’s probably going back to our room to settle. Maybe this is the time to confront him.

I tried to wait a few minutes before rushing back to our room, so I don’t put him off immediately. 

Baz is unpacking his items when I get up to our room. He doesn’t say anything when I get there, and continues to put his stuff away. He probably knew I was coming, cause of his vampire senses. 

“Baz,” I start. “You’re back.”

“How observant of you, Snow,” he sneers, still not turning around to acknowledge me.

“Where were you?” Might as well get straight to the point.

“I don’t think that concerns you.”

“Yes it does.”

“And why's that Snow? So you can go and report my news to the Mage?”

“No, because I’m your roommate, and this is stuff roommates talk about. So come one then, tell me what happened.”

Baz let’s our an uncharacteristic snort. “The fact that we’re roommates means absolutely nothing to me.”

“Stop being a prat, Baz. Where’ve you been? You look like shite, and I can see that you did something to your leg. What happened to it?”

“If that’s your way of getting me to tell you anything, then I suggest trying something else.”

He keeps avoiding all of my questions, and he’s still not looking at me. It’s getting fucking annoying. “Were you plotting? Is that why you were gone for so long?”

That clearly was the wrong thing to say. I can see Baz stiffen up, and he whips around.

His nostrils are flaring and he looks like he wants to punch me in the face. But at least he was looking at me now.

“ _ Plotting?  _ You think I wasn’t here because I was  _ plotting _ ? That I would miss classes to plot against you? Do you really think of yourself so highly, or are you just that stupid? Even if I was plotting, why the fuck would I tell you? Have you forgotten that I  _ despise  _ you? That you and your precious Mage have been after me and my family for years, for no reason?”

He’s spitting word after word at me in an angry haze, and I can get myself getting angry too. He  _ still  _ hasn’t answered my questions and he’s making it seem like I’m some sort of idiot for asking about his absence.

“Then why were you not here, Baz? If you weren’t plotting, then what was it, huh? What are you hiding?” 

“I’m not going to waste anymore breath on you, Snow. This conversation is over.” He pushes past me and tries to leave, but I get to the door first and block it. 

“What, you’re just gonna run away? Why can’t you just tell me the truth?” 

“Fuck.  _ Off _ . Don’t follow me,” he grits out. He shoves me away from the door, and slams the door as he exits.

Well. That conversation went as well as expected.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have honestly have no idea what I’m doing. Please comment and let me know if this fic is any good.


	3. Chapter 3

Baz

Fucking Snow. He couldn’t even let me breathe for a second before he jumped back on his plotting accusations. 

I don’t know how I’m gonna manage to avoid him this year. He seems to have become an even more of an idiot since the last time I saw him, and he’s convinced that I’ve been plotting his downfall.

I stay in the Catacombs as late as possible, hoping that when I get back up to our room, Snow will be in bed.

He is in bed, but unfortunately, he doesn’t seem to be asleep. I can hear his heartbeat, and it’s abnormally fast for someone who should be asleep.

Still, he doesn’t say anything as I grab my clothes and get ready to go to sleep. 

When I’m finally in bed, he turns to me. “Baz,” he whispers, as if somebody was listening to us. “I know you're awake.” 

“What now, Snow?” I truly can't deal with him right now, or else I think I might accidentally kick him in the face.

“Just. Um. Fuck-“

“Spit it out Snow.”

“Where were you Baz? Just tell the truth.”

I sigh. I’m starting to wish I had died in that coffin.

“Fuck off, Snow. Please.”

And for some reason, he actually does.

* * *

Simon

Baz is gone in the morning before I can talk to him, which is weird, considering I’m usually up before him. I had hoped to talk to him when he came back last night, but he sounded too tired to have a conversation. 

I have to tell him about his mother, and this time I’m going to try to avoid saying something that will set him off. But let’s be honest, pretty much anything I say sets him off.

When I go down for breakfast, I don’t see Baz there. And it seems like I’m not the only one looking for him. Agatha is currently staring at Baz’s usual seat.

I feel my chest tighten up. I don’t see what she sees in him. I mean, I sort of see what she sees in him. He is one of the smartest people I know, and also one of the fittest. He’s also great at football, somehow graceful yet ruthless at the same time. But he’s still an evil vampire and he’s plotting to kill me.

I try to push both Agatha and Baz out of mind, and focus on my scones, which seem to be the only good thing in my life right now. Besides Penny of course.

“Good morning, Si.” Speak of the devil.

“Morning Pen.”

“Did you sleep any better last night?”

“Kind of. Baz got back pretty late so I had to stay awake and make sure he was coming back and not going off somewhere.”

“You’ve got to stop obsessing over him, Simon,” she sighs, pouring herself tea. “He just got back. He’s not ‘plotting’ anything.” 

“But he is, Penny. Why else would he have been missing for weeks?” I don’t get why Penny doesn’t believe me, with all the evidence in front of her.

“I don’t know, Simon. But I doubt he left school just to plot. You’ve been saying that he’s been plotting since the day you met him, so why would he need to leave school all of sudden to do it?”

She’s got a point. “Then why has he been missing?” 

“Once again Simon, I don’t know. If you care so much why don’t you just ask him?” 

“I tried, and he ran off to the Catacombs. He’s not gonna tell me anything.” 

“Well next time, don't try to sound like you’re accusing him of plotting of your downfall.” 

“But he _ is _plotting my downfall, Penny!”

She sighs and closes her eyes. “You’ve reached your Baz allowance for today. We’re done talking about him. We’re moving on now. Did you study for the elocution exam?”

_ Shit. _“We have a elocution exam today?”

She stands up, finished with her tea. “C’mon, let’s go study in the library before class starts. Wrap up your scones.”

* * *

Penny helps me study enough so that I at least have a chance at passing the exam, which I think is better than if I had studied alone. 

I finally catch a glimpse of Baz before the exam starts. He’s caught up in all of the classes we share, despite missing weeks of material. He actually seems to be ahead of everyone. Maybe that’s what he was doing while he was gone. Getting private tutoring lessons to get to the top of our class.

I mention it to Penny, who rolls her eyes at me and tells me to focus on passing the exam.

After the exam, Baz seems to disappear again. I try to convince Penny to go and look for him with me, but she refuses. “Reaching your Baz limit also includes forcing me to help you stalk him.”

“It’s not really stalking, it’s- it’s more like following him around to see what he’s up to.”

“That’s the literal definition of stalking, Simon.”

“Whatever,” I huff in response. “I’m gonna get to the bottom of whatever he’s doing.”

“Have fun then. I’ll see you at dinner.”

I think Baz has become better at plotting in secrecy, because I can’t find him anywhere. I’m going to have to confront him when he gets back at night from wherever he goes. I’m gonna try to talk to him about his mom first, and then mention his plotting so he doesn’t run away as fast as he did yesterday.

I really just have to get the whole situation with his mother out of the way. I haven’t told anyone, not even Penny, even though we have no secrets pact. It just didn’t feel like my secret to tell her. But if I don’t tell anyone soon, I think I’m gonna explode. I’ve never been good at keeping secrets.

* * *

Baz

I got up earlier this morning than I usually do so I can start with my “_ Avoiding Snow so I don’t get any closer to him and somehow develop even more feelings for him and so I can somewhat enjoy the last year of my existence _” plan. It seems like a lengthy title, but I don't really have time to come up with another one while I’m on the run.

I skip breakfast, and instead eat an aero bar that I’ve stolen from Snow. I take my notes and books with me to the Wavering Woods so I can study for the elocution exam. I’ve managed to stay caught up with all my classes, and I’m planning on getting ahead of everyone.

I’ve done a pretty good job at avoiding Snow. I only see him during our shared classes, and I try my best to avoid any contact with him during classes. I think this plan might actually work.

I stay out late as I can, like I did last night. And just like last night, Snow seems to be awake when I get back up to our room. Except this time, he’s not in bed. Instead, he seems to be waiting for me at his desk.

“Baz,” he starts. “I need to talk to you.”

I knew this plan wouldn’t work. The universe hates me far too much to make my life the least bit comfortable. “I don’t want to speak to you.”

“It’s important. It’s- it’s about-”

“Get on with it, Snow,” I snap. I want this conversation to be over as soon as possible. 

“It’s about your mother. She came- well there was a Visiting. While you were gone, she came to Visit you.”

“My mother Visited?” My mother Visited and I wasn’t here? I had the chance to see her, for the first time in ages, and I wasn’t _ here_. The universe really does want to break me even more than I thought.

I don’t realize that I’ve zoned out until I hear Snow’s voice calling me. 

* * *

Simon 

Baz isn’t looking at me. His eyes are closed tightly and his hands are balled into fists. I’ve never seen him look so defeated and stricken before. It makes something inside me stir uncomfortably. “Baz,” I call to him, trying to get his attention. “Are you alright?”

He opens his eyes and looks at me as if he forget I was even here. “What? I’m fine,” he says, avoiding eye contact with me, like he’s ashamed that I’ve witnessed him experience an emotion besides boredom. “Did she say anything to you?”

“Yeah. She had an important message for you.”

“Well spit it out then, Snow. What’s taking you so long?” His regular sneer has returned to his face, and I resist the urge to tell him to piss off.

“She said that her killer still walks, and that- that you needed to talk to someone named Nicodemus.”

He’s frowning now, and looks confused and angry. “Who the _ fuck _is Nicodemus?”

“I’m not sure. She didn’t tell me who he was. And she- she told me to give you something.” 

“What? What is it?”

I feel myself turning red. How do I give him the kiss? I’m pretty sure if I try to kiss his forehead, he’ll deck me. He wouldn’t even care about Anathema. “Well, she kissed me on my forehead and told me to give that to you.”

“Oh,” he frowns again. It doesn’t seem to be what he was expecting. I don’t know what he was expecting, but it surely wasn’t that.

“Well then,” he starts, still not looking at me. “Was that all that happened during the Visiting?”

“Yeah. That’s all she said and did.”

He nods. He seems to be a bit shaken up, but he’s trying to hide it. I don’t know why though. I think anyone would be shocked if their mother came back from the dead and told them about her killer.

“I’m going to get ready for bed then,” he grabs his pyjamas and heads towards the bathroom. “Good night, Snow.” He’s never said good night to me before. Then again, I’ve never told him that his mother wants him to avenge his death before.

“Night Baz.”

* * *

Later, when we’re both in bed, I try to talk to him again. 

“Baz?” I whisper, trying to see if he’s awake. “Baz, are you still awake?”

He doesn’t move, but he says, “It's hard to sleep when you’ve just learned that your mother came to Visit you and you weren’t even there.”

“Well, do you have any idea who her killer is?”

“No. I don’t even know who the fuck Nicodemus is.”

I’m about to say something that will probably make him laugh at me, but if I don’t say it, I know I’ll regret it. “If you want me to, I'll help you look for your mother’s killer. And Nicodemus.”

He’s quiet for so long that I think he’s fallen asleep. I should probably be asleep too.

Just as I’m about to doze off I hear him whisper so quietly that I think I might have imagined it.

“Okay.”  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is so bad? I might just give up. Who knows. Leave comments if you like this.


	4. Chapter 4

**Simon**

Baz is gone (again) when I wake up.

Last night felt like a fever dream. I can’t believe he agreed to let me help him with his mother’s murder.

Why _ did _he agree to work with me? We’re mortal enemies, he shouldn't trust me. Unless he only agreed to work with me as part of some plot. Maybe he only agreed to work together so he can spend more time with me, pinpoint my weaknesses, and then kill me. 

Then again, it was my idea to work together. Maybe I’m just reading into it. It’s just going to be extremely difficult working with that git. 

But I’m still going to help him if I can. Because she was his mother. She was killed right in front of her son.

And well- that’s just _ wrong _.

**Baz**

I don’t recall having been on any drugs last night, but I must have been. Otherwise, there would be no explanation as to why I agreed to Snow’s help.

I don’t know why he agreed to help me. Is this an easier way to stalk me without the hard work of following me around? Or is it just his overbearing sense of heroism?

I left before he woke this morning. I didn’t want to see the regret on his face when he realizes that he had promised to help his vampire roommate, who he hated, in avenging his mother. 

If he wants to act like last night’s conversation didn’t happen, it was fine by me. I don’t need him anyways. 

I was going to find my mother’s killer and help her get the peace she deserved. Snow or not.

**Simon **

Baz seems to ignoring me. Again.

He refuses to make eye contact with me during classes, and when I try to catch up with him in the halls, he seems to disappear.

I thought we had made a breakthrough last night. I don’t know why he’s acting like such a twat all of sudden. (Well, he’s a twat all the time. He’s just being an even bigger one right now.)

If he thinks he can just ignore me, he’s wrong. If he didn’t actually want my help, he should say it to my face, instead of running away from me like a coward.

I decide it’s time to confront him. I think I saw him head towards pitch, and decide to check there. 

Only I don’t have to walk too far. It turns out Baz was closer than I thought.

And he’s not alone.

Standing very closely together, are Baz and Agatha.

**Baz**

I need to get my mind off moron Snow and my mother. I have football practice now, which might have acted as some sort of distraction, if I was allowed to play. Coach benched me. I know it’s fair. I’ve been gone for weeks, without explanation. I knew if I explained the situation, he would go easy on me, but I don’t need his pity, or anyone else’s.

Before I can get to the pitch, another distraction comes my way, in the form of a pretty blonde.

“Hello, Basil,” Wellbelove says, tucking a piece of her hair gracefully behind her ear.

“Wellbelove.”

“You’ve missed classes since the start of school year. Have you been alright?”

“I’m fine, thank you.”

I think she expects me to ask how’s she’s been, or something else of that matter. It would be polite to do so, but I don’t have the energy to extend this conversation any longer than needed.

“Well, you know Basil,” Wellbelove starts again, her voice becoming flirty. “I know you probably don’t need my help, but if you wanted to review the material you missed with me, I would be glad to do so.”

Well shit. Is she asking me out on a study date? I’m beginning to feel bad about flirting with her. I only ever did so to get on Snow’s nerves. I never actually wanted to date her, considering I’m gay and in love with her boyfriend. I should put an end to whatever fantasy she has of us together before it develops any further.

“Listen Wellbelove,” I start, trying to figure out a way to put her down slowly. “That’s a nice offer, but I don’t think we should spend anymore time together.”

Wellbelove’s smile drops.

“Oh. Why not?” 

“Well, because you’re dating Snow, and I don’t think he’ll like the idea of us spending time together.”

“Oh, well, you don’t need to worry about that at all. Simon and I are broken up. He doesn’t need to worry about who I hang out with.” With that, Wellbelove’s pretty smile is back on. 

“Still, I don’t think it’s a good idea. You should focus on you and Snow’s relationship. You don’t know what you want, and it’s certainly not me.”

Wellbelove scowls in a weirdly attractive way.

“Why does everybody think they know what’s best for me? I’m capable of making my own decisions.” 

Before I can answer, another pretty blond approaches me. This time though, I don’t he’s as interested in studying with me, as he is in decking me.

“_ Baz_,” Snow practically spits in my face. “Didn’t I tell you to leave Agatha alone?”

“I’m allowed to speak to whomever I want Snow,” I say, sneering at him. “And I really think you should be the one to stay away from her, considering you're her ex.”

“We’re not- we’re not broken up!” Simon shouts at my face. “We’re just on a break. Stay away from my girlfriend, Baz.” 

“Or else what? You’ll go off and burn down the school?” 

Snow turns red. He opens his mouth, and before some poor attempt at a retort comes out, Wellbelove finally decides to cut in. 

“Simon, I am _ not _ your girlfriend. I can speak to anyone I want.” Wellbelove’s tone seems to have become exponentially colder. “I don’t need your permission to talk to anybody. Why do you always do this?” 

With that, Wellbelove gracefully fumes off.

“Agatha, wait!” Simon calls after her. He turns to me, his face properly red now. “This is all your fault!”

“_Mine?_ Wellbelove and I were just getting along fine before you decided to show up and started to stammer.”

“Why do you always have to be such a prick?” Snow growls. 

“I don’t have time for your stupid questions, Snow. I have to get to football.” I begin walking away from him when I hear him yell something. 

“Stay away from Agatha, Baz. I mean it.”

I turn around, and give him a smirk I know will infuriate him. 

“Make me.”

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I’ve been gone for so long! This is my junior year of high school, and it’s been really stressful. I hope I’ll be able to post at least semi regularly from now. Also, I just got wayward son, and I’m planning on reading it all today. I’m v excited.


	5. Chapter 5

**Baz**

After football practice. I head down to the Catacombs. I’m not really in the mood to listen to Snow’s stammering shouts about his  _ girlfriend  _ just yet. 

It’s not even my fault really. Wellbelove came to me, not the other way around. I suppose I could have stopped myself from riling Snow up, but after years of pissing off Snow, it’s quite difficult to just stop all of a sudden. 

I have no idea how to get him off my back about the whole Wellbelove situation. I mean, I _ could _ tell him that I’m gay and in love with him. That could work. Though I’m pretty sure he’ll think I’m taking the piss, or plotting. 

When I go back to my room late at night, Snow is up, like every other night since I’ve been here. Crowley, is this going to become a routine? Was the bastard just going to stay awake just so he can shout at me when I come back? 

“Baz,” he starts growling. For snake’s sake, I can’t do this. 

“What the fuck do you want Snow?” 

“I want you to stop flirting with my girlfriend.”

“ _ Ex _ -girlfriend, Snow,” He growls again. “I wasn’t flirting with her. She came up to me, not the other way around. She was the one doing all the flirting.”

“You’re lying.”

“Snow, I have no interest in Wellbelove.”

“Yeah right. Is that why you’ve been flirting with her for years?”

“Snow, I truly don’t have any interest in Wellbelove. Either accept it or fuck off.”

“Why should I believe you?”

“Because I’m gay, Snow.”

That seems to shut him up. 

**Simon**

Whatever I was about to say dies in my throat.

Baz is gay? He can’t be gay. If he was, I would know about it. 

“You’re gay?” I respond, and I internally wince at how stupid I sound.

“Yes Snow, that is what I said about 30 seconds ago,” He retorts. 

“If you’re gay, then why do you flirt with Agatha so much?”

He throws me a lazy smirk. “Isn’t it obvious Snow?” When I don’t respond, he sighs. “To piss you off.” 

Whatever confusion I was feeling is replaced with anger. “What? You only flirted with her to set me off? Not because you actually liked her?”

“Are you planning on reiterating everything I say?”

I can feel my magic rising. “You- you’re a prick, Baz. Agatha actually likes for some fu-fucking reason, and you only used her for your own fun.” 

“I don’t know why you’re so upset. You should be happy. Now that you know that I have no intention of ‘stealing’ her, you can now easily sweep her off her feet and ride into the sunset.” 

“That’s not the point, you arse! She doesn’t like me anymore, because she likes  _ you _ ! And you don’t give a shit about her. This is a new low, even for you.” 

“What do you want me to do, then? Do you want me to pretend to return her feelings and court her?” He sneers. “I knew you enjoyed playing the part of the tragic hero, Chosen One, but I didn’t realize you would go as far as letting your precious girlfriend date your enemy just so she could play out her rebellious strike.”

“Shut up, just  _ shut up Baz!  _ You’re an evil prick, who doesn’t give a shit about anyone but himself.” 

“I think we’re done here, Snow,” he says as he moves to get his pajamas. His eyes are flashing with anger and hatred, and he’s moving as fast as he can.

Before I can shout at him one last time, he’s off to the bathroom without another word. 

**Baz**

After last night’s fight, I had hoped to escape the room extra early in the morning so I could avoid Snow. But apparently he figured out my plan.

As soon as I step out of bed, he’s shooting up too, half-naked. He doesn’t wear a shirt to sleep, like a heathen, and I’m forced to avoid eye-contact with him so I don’t self-combust.

“You can’t just sneak off again, Baz. We need to talk.”

It takes everything in me to not roll my eyes. It seems as though every time he opens his mouth, he’s saying the same thing. “I know you have a limited vocabulary, but you must know some other words.” 

“Shut up. Be serious.” 

“About what? You start off each conversation with ‘ _ Baz we need to talk,’”  _ I mimic his ridiculous voice. “And then you go off with the same old accusatory bullshit.”

“That’s because you’re always plotting. It’s not my fault.” 

Great fucking snakes, I’m about ready to off him. Or myself. 

I move towards the door, but Snow moves faster than me and blocks it. 

“Wait! I’m sorry, okay? Let’s just- let’s just sit and talk.”

“For fuck’s sake, Snow. What is there to talk about?”

“Well, we need to talk about your mother. And how to track down that Nicodemus guy.” 

“Why?” 

He lets out a growl. “Do you not want to find your mum’s killer?” 

“I do. I just didn’t realize you were going to help me.” 

He looks at me like  _ I’m  _ the stupid one. “I told you I would help you.” 

“I thought I hallucinated that. I figured that even you wouldn’t be stupid enough to work with somone who would willingly throw you to the merwolves.” 

He looks at me suspiciously. “You wouldn’t do that.”

I raise one of my eyebrows at him, knowing how much it pisses him off. “Oh? Would you like me to demonstrate?” 

“Shut up. I want to help you, so just let me.”

“What if I don’t want your help?” 

He lets out another growl. “Why do you always have to be a stubborn git?” 

“Why do you always insert yourself into other people's problems?” 

He sighs defeatedly. “C’mon Baz. I bet if we work together, we can find the killer much faster.”

He’s got a point, though I’ll never admit it. I really should tell him to fuck off. I’m probably going to have spend hours with him on this, and I’ll have to be close to him a lot. 

It’s going to be very difficult to follow through on my “Avoid Snow” plan if I’m around him like that. But it’d also be easier to find my mother’s killer. “Fine,” I hear myself saying, without really thinking. “You can help.” 

Snow breaks out in a grin, and it makes my chest ache. He never smiles like that if I’m in close proximity with him. 

“Cool,” He says, still grinning. “Should we start… now?”

I narrow my eyes at him. “You want to start the investigation at this precise moment.” 

“The sooner the better, right?”

I sigh. I had forgotten for a moment that Snow was very similar to an overeager Labrador. “It’s Sunday. I think we should wait at least till tomorrow to start research. When the library is actually open.” 

“Oh. Right. Um, then, let’s make some rules so we don’t mess up the investigation. We should- we should have a truce.”

“What kind of truce?”

“The kind where we can’t try to kill each other until the killer is found.” 

“That sounds impossible.”

“It’ll be easier to help you if I know you’re not about to throw me to the merwolves.”

I feign shock. “Snow, I don’t know where you got that sort of idea into your head. I would  _ never  _ do that.”

“Shut up. Do you agree?”

“If I have to stop myself from hurting you due to your own stupidity, you have to stop following me around.” 

“I only follow you because you’re plotting.” 

I wonder if throwing a shoe at him will violate the Anathema. “You also have to stop accusing me of plotting if we work together.”

“It’s not an accusation, if it’s true,” he mumbled to himself. I glare at him. “What was that?”

“Nothing. If I have to do all those things, you have to stop flirting with Agatha.” 

I roll my eyes. Not this again. “Snow, I told you. I have no interest in Wellbelove. I’m gay, remember?”

“Just say you won’t!”

“Fine. I won’t flirt with Wellbelove. You know, it really is not my fault that your girlfriend was interested in me. It’s not hers either. It’s nobody’s fault that I would just make a better boyfriend than you.”

He looks like he wants to hurt me. “You’re a prick, Baz,” Snow says.

“And you’re a blubbering idiot. We all have our faults, Snow.” 

I think for a second that I’ve finally pushed him to the edge, and now he won’t help me. But then he steps towards me with his hand reached out. “So… truce?”

I look down at his mole-covered hand. This is a bad idea. Working with Snow is a  _ very  _ bad idea.

I reach out my own hand and grasps his.

“Truce.”

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I’m sorry that I didn’t update for 3 months. Like I said, this is my junior year, and I’m really trying to do well in school. I took my SATs this month, and I did not do so hot on them. But right now I’m on Christmas break for the next 2 weeks, so I’m gonna try to update at least one more time before break ends. Next chapter is when we really get into things. ;)


	6. Chapter 6

**Simon**

Baz and I started working together about two weeks ago, and so far, we’ve managed to not kill each other. (We came close a few times, but we didn’t, which in my book is a win.)

We ended up telling Penny about Baz’s mum. After dinner one night, I told Baz that Penny might be a help if we told her about the Visiting. He had given me an incredulous look. 

“What?” I said, through a mouthful of the scone I had saved from dinner. He wrinkled his nose at the crumbs that flew out of my mouth.

“Are you telling me that you didn’t tell your sidekick anything about the Visiting?”

“No? I didn’t think it was my thing to tell. It’s your private business.”

“I didn’t think you knew what the word ‘private’ meant,” Baz muttered as he continued on with the book he was reading. 

I had ignored that jab.

The next day, Baz had explained what we were working on to Penny. He told her nearly everything, except for the part where I accused him of stealing Agatha and him coming out. We haven’t talked about that conversation at all after that night; I’ve thought about it a bit though. It’s not that I particularly care that he’s into blokes. I’m not homophobic or anything. I was just surprised, that’s all.

How could I have not known he was gay? We had shared a room together for 7 years, and I still didn’t know. How did _ he _ know? Did he have a boyfriend? No. That couldn’t be possible. I would have noticed a boyfriend. I’m not _ that _oblivious, even if Baz may think so. 

Penny was a bit cross with me after Baz finished telling her the story. “How could you have not told me Simon? What happened to ‘no secrets’?”

“It was _ Baz’s _ mum. I didn’t think that our pact included him.”

“Trust me Bunce, I was just as surprised as you are about Snow’s sudden ability of keeping his mouth shut,” Baz unhelpfully added. I threw a wad of paper at him, which he ducked gracefully.

Since telling Penny, we’ve worked out a nice work system. A few times a week Penny comes to our room to help do research, and we sort through all kinds of resources. There’s a giant board in our room that has all the information we know on it. Baz provides snacks for us, which I mostly end up eating. 

It’s actually kind of nice working with Baz. He and Penny get along really well. Neither of them would admit it, but they’ve become almost good friends, talking about all sorts of spells and magkical history. Baz and I are getting along a little better too. He tries not to torment me, and I try not to ask too many questions about his whereabouts. 

He’s still doing that thing that he’s been doing since he got back, where he tries to ignore me and refuses to speak to me during class. He taunts and teases me while we work on the research together, but outside of that he freezes me out. I don’t know why, but everytime he ignores me, I feel sort of hollow and unnerved. 

I don’t think I’m ready to figure out why I feel that way, so I’m gonna put that thought on my list of things that I’m not supposed to think about. 

**Baz**

Working with Snow has been an interesting experience.

We don’t fight as often as we did before the truce, and I can hunt in peace knowing he has to stay away from me. We’ve made solid progress on the investigation, with the help of Bunce. 

The real victory though, is the fact that I can still manage to avoid Snow outside of the research. Sometimes when we work together, we get too close together, and something close to hope rises in my chest, and I’m forced to shut it down by spending the next day avoiding Snow to clear my head. 

So far, the system of denial is working. 

* * *

Miss Possibelf is currently rearranging our seats in class because some imbeciles couldn’t figure out how to keep their mouths shut. Normally I wouldn’t mind, except for the fact that my seat had been close to the board and far enough from Snow that ensured that I wouldn't be encouraged to interact with him. 

She casts a spell on us that forces us to move to our new desks. I turned to introduce myself to my new desk partner, and I find myself looking at a vaguely familiar face. 

“Hello Basil,” says the boy. I swear I’ve seen him before. I think he might be part of the Old Families. 

“Hello,” I politely responded. The boy smiles knowingly. 

“You don’t remember me, do you?” I raise my eyebrows at him. “Am I supposed to keep track of everyone I meet?”

“No.” He smiles again, and I find myself getting annoyed. “But it's a bit rude you don’t, considering we’ve met a few times.” 

“Are you planning on telling me who you are, or are you just going to keep rambling?”

“Isaac Ravelen. Again, we’ve met several times.” 

He _ was _part of the Old Families. I remember going to some events thrown by his family. None of them were anything special or memorable, especially considering the fact I couldn’t remember the boy in front of me; he was certainly attractive enough to be remembered.

“I suppose we _ have _met once or twice.”

Before he can respond, Possibelf is calling our attention back to her. 

**Simon**

Possibelf changed our seats today. I had hoped that I would be seated next to Baz. That way I could keep an eye on him without him accusing me of breaking our truce. 

Instead, I got seated next to Keris, and Baz was sitting next to some boy with messy brown hair. I think they knew each other, because the boy had begun to talk to Baz casually and relaxed. Most people were usually intimidated by him, probably because he always looked pissed off and also because he’s unfairly attractive. At least, that’s why girls seem to have such trouble speaking to him. 

Before I could figure out who the guy was and how he knew Baz, Possibelf started speaking again.

“Alright everyone, bring your focus back to me. We’re going to be starting a new project that will require you to work with your seat partners for the next few weeks. You will be working on this project in and out of class, so get to know your partners. I’ll be assigning each pair with a certain spell, and you’ll be required to research it. You will be presenting your research papers in front of class, and will be performing the spells.” 

Keris sighs next to me, probably at the fact that she’ll be stuck working with me. It’s no secret that I’m shite at public speaking, on top of spellwork. Baz on the other hand, is good at both. At the thought of him, I turn to see what he’s doing. 

Just as a turn to look at him, I see his partner whisper something in his ear, which causes Baz to smirk. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Baz actually get along with anybody so well besides Dev and Niall. 

Sure, it’s not like he’s actually being friendly to the guy, but he doesn’t seem to be going out of his way to be his usual shitty self. 

Watching Baz and his new friend get along makes me uncomfortable, so I turn around and try to focus on what Possibelf is saying.

**Baz**

The new seating in class turned out to be a good thing. Isaac has become sort of a friend over the past few weeks. He seems to be one of the only other sane people in our class, and a good conversationalist. 

We were assigned a quote from Macbeth; “**Fair is foul and foul is fair.**” It’s a famous quote so it wasn’t difficult to work on. Snow, on the other hand, was assigned some 16th century spell that neither he nor Keris had heard of.

He complained loudly about it last night, because Snow apparently thinks we’ve become close enough to discuss our problems with each other. 

“I just don’t get why we have to do this,” Snow whined. “How is learning about old spells gonna help us?” 

“Learning the meaning and context behind the spells makes them easier to cast. Did you not learn anything in first year?” 

“Shut up. I remember stuff from first year. I just think it’s stupid that I got an ancient spell.” 

“It’s not that old, and it's a useful spell. Maybe if you took the time to do your project and educate yourself, you would realize that.” 

“I’m trying!” Snow snapped. “Not all of us have amazing partners that we’re best friends with.” 

I raised my eyebrow. “Are you talking about Isaac?” 

“Well, yeah. You two seem to get on extremely well,” He said, glaring. 

“You almost sound jealous, Snow.”

“No! I just- you’re- fuck off. You don't get along with anybody. Just- just a bit weird how well you two get along.” 

“I don’t get along with _ you, _ Snow, because you’re an insufferable twat.”

“Whatever,” he mumbled before getting under his covers. 

**Simon**

I don’t care what Baz says. This project is stupid. He might have gotten a new best friend out of it, but all I was going to get was a failing grade. 

Plus, ever since it began, we’ve spent less time on the investigation. Baz had been hanging out with his new friend more frequently, and Penny was constantly lecturing me about the importance of school work when I told her that we needed to work on research.

“You need to do well on the project, Simon,” she scolded. “Your grades aren’t optimal right now.”

I’m glad that we were almost done with the project. I feel bad for Keris, who's trying her best to snap at me whenever we work together and I get distracted, which is happening right now. 

“Simon,” She sighs, frustrated. She snaps her fingers in front of my face to get my attention. “We need to wrap up this project. It’s due by the end of the week, and we still have plenty to do.” 

“Sorry,” I mumbled. We were currently in the library, and I had gotten distracted by Baz and his partner, who were seated at a table near us. They weren’t even working on their project. They were just sitting there, talking about their plans for the weekend. Apparently, there was a party in the Wavering Woods on Friday night. 

“Do you think you’ll go? It seems like a lot of our classmates will be there,” I heard Isaac ask. 

That was a stupid question. Baz rarely goes to any parties, unless his friends drag him to them. 

“I don’t think so. I don’t really go to those sorts of things.” _ See? _ I knew Baz better than his new friend. 

“Well, if you change your mind, I’ll be there to keep you company if need be.” 

“Thanks,” Baz replied, and I swear to Merlin that I could see the slightest smile on his face. 

“Simon!” Keris finally snapped. “Since you’re clearly not in the mood to work and too busy staring at Baz, we’ll work together later. Trixie and I are going to the dining hall for tea now.” 

Before I can argue that I was _ not _staring at Baz, I notice Trixie standing right next to me. 

When did she get here? I didn’t even notice her. I guess I may have been a little distracted by Baz after all.

“Hi Trixie,” I greet her sheepishly. 

“Hi, Simon. Sorry to steal Keris from you.” She smiled down at me.

“It’s fine. Enjoy your tea.” Keris stood up and slipped her hand into Trixie’s.

“I’ll see you later Simon. Hopefully we’ll be able to wrap up the project the next time we get together,” Keris said, and I nodded in agreement.

“See you in class, Keris.”

As they walked away, I could hear Keris complaining to Trixie about something along the lines of _ obliviousness _ and _ feelings. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, I know things have been extremely weird and depressing right now. I’m currently in quarantine, so I got to finally finish up this chapter that I promised 3 months ago, so I guess at least I’m getting something out of this quarantine. I’m extremely bored, so please come talk to me on tumblr @ Pll162. Seriously, I’m going insane. Anyways, I hoped you enjoyed this chapter. I don’t know when the next one will be out, considering the circumstances, but let’s hope it’s sooner than later.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy one month of quarantine! one of the only good things to come out of this quarantine is the fact that i have more time to write and update somewhat regularly. anyways, i hope you enjoy.

**Penelope **

“There’s a party in the Wavering Woods this Friday, and I think we should go,” Simon announces as he sits down at our table for tea, with one hand holding a plate of scones and the other holding a half eaten scone. 

I push my books aside to make room for his plate. “Why exactly should we go?” 

Simon shrugs, and I give him a look that says _ explain yourself before I force you to. _“Dunno, thought it could be fun. It can be like-like a reward for finishing our projects,” he says while applying a generous amount of butter to his scones.

I know Simon, so I know that that’s definitely not the only reason he wants to go. His real reason is probably related to something else, or, more likely, _ someone _ else. “Where did you hear about this party from?” 

“I heard some people talking about it in the library.” He doesn’t look at me as he says it.

“What people in the library, Si?” 

“People,” he mumbled. I narrowed my eyes at him.

“Simon.” 

He sighed dramatically. “Fine! It was that kid from our class and… Baz. But- I swear Penny, I’m not going to just watch him. I really think it could be fun.” 

He was giving me a hopeful smile, like he genuinely just wanted to go for fun, with no ulterior motives. I couldn’t say no to him. We never got opportunities to just relax and have fun, and this party could be one. Besides, it might actually be fun.

“Fine, we can go.” He shot me a full blown grin. “But,” I started. “I think we should invite Agatha.” 

His grin disappeared. “That doesn’t sound like a good idea.”

“Well I think it is.” I was tired of the awkwardness between them.

I always knew they weren’t good for each other as a couple and thought they would be better off as friends. But right now, they could barely look at each other, and I was stuck in the middle of their funk. They needed to hang around each other and just get over the weirdness between them. 

“I think if we all went to the party together, it could help make things less uncomfortable between you two.” 

“I haven’t talked to her in weeks Penny, I can’t just ask her to go with us to the party.” 

“Well then_ I’ll _ask her. And we’ll have a great time at the party, and this shittiness can stop.” He gave me an incredulous look, to which I responded to by patting his hand. 

“You’re right, Si. I think we’ll have fun at this party.” 

**Baz**

Isaac and I completed our project a week ago. 

And yet, we continued to hang around each other outside of class. You couldn't blame me for spending time with him, though. He’s more pleasant company than the rest of our class. He’s also not up Snow’s arse like everyone else. The only time he’s been mentioned in our conversation is when he caught Snow staring at us in the library earlier. I told him not to worry, that one of Snow’s favorite pastimes was to stare at me, which caused Isaac to laugh. 

At football practice, Dev and Niall are talking about the same party that Isaac mentioned. Some girl that Niall fancies was going to be there, and Niall thinks it’ll be the perfect opportunity to talk to her. 

They both turn and look at me expectantly. 

“What?” I say.

“So, do you want to go?” Niall asks me. 

I shrug. It’s a cursed thing that I’ve picked up from spending so much time with Snow lately. “Why not.” 

Dev and Niall look surprised, and share some sort of knowing look. 

“What?” I snapped, not enjoying their silent discussion.

Dev shrugs. “Nothing, it’s just surprising you agreed without us having to literally drag you to the party.” 

“Well, I don’t have any plans for Friday night, so there’s nothing to stop me.”

“If you say so.” Dev doesn’t look convinced by my reasoning, but I couldn’t care less. I had other things to worry about, like making sure Coach Mac doesn’t go into another lecture about paying attention during practices, which is what we’re currently doing. 

I can see him eyeing the three of us, so I turn my focus back to the pitch. 

* * *

During practice, I caught Snow watching me from the bleachers, and I internally cursed.

He had promised to stop stalking me; it was part of the truce, and now suddenly he was going to start showing up to my practices again? Start making it difficult for me again to focus, with his suffocating stares and his unfairly attractive glares? What a load of bollocks. 

I was going to confront him after practice, but I decided against it. I just needed to keep ignoring him, as much as I could. If I start insulting and arguing with him again, especially in public, it was only going to hurt me more. I can’t get anymore closer to him. Having to work with him to find my mother’s killer is bad enough, I’m not going to strain what little self-control I had left. 

_ Just don’t look at him, _ I reminded myself. _ If you keep pushing, it’ll end in flames. _

**Simon**

I stopped by the pitch after tea to see if I could talk to Baz about doing more investigating. Clearly he wasn’t busy, if he was able to sit around with his friends in the library. 

By the time I’d gotten to the pitch, practice had begun. I decided to watch and stay, because I hadn’t been to one of Baz’s practices since we called for a truce and I stopped following him. I don’t think this could count as ‘stalking’; I just wanted to watch the practice. 

Baz was still as ruthless and graceful as ever, maybe even more so. His hair was up, and it was a very good look on him.

He should wear it up more often. Or, he should just wear it down, without any gel. I think that’s my favorite hairstyle on him. His hair looks incredibly soft when it’s down. His slicked hair doesn’t do him justice. I mean- he does still look attractive when it’s slicked back, because he’s infuriatingly handsome no matter what the circumstances are, but he looks even better when it’s down. 

I got so distracted by his hair, that I didn’t even notice that training had ended and he had slipped off to the lockers. 

I try to wait for him to come out, and after an hour of waiting I leave. I don’t know how the hell he’s able to sneak off like that. He doesn’t even have to anymore, ever since our truce. I just wanted to talk to him, that’s all. 

* * *

I don’t catch sight of Baz again till dinner. There’s a new addition at his table.

“_ Penny, _” I hiss quietly at her. “Look who’s sitting at Baz’s table.” She looks at me tiredly before glancing at the table. 

“Isaac? So what?”

“Don’t you think it’s weird? Nobody sits with Baz besides Dev and Niall.”

She shrugged. “I guess Baz has finally made a new friend.” 

“How can they become friends so quickly?”

“We became friends the day we met, Simon.”

“Yeah but- that’s different. This is _ Baz _we’re talking about. I don’t trust Isaac. He’s always hanging around Baz nowadays. It’s like he’s obsessed with him.”

Penny puts her fork and looks me right in the eyes. “_ You _ think Isaac’s the one obsessed with Baz?” 

I shovel roasted potatoes into my mouth so I don’t have to answer her.

“Just leave them alone, Si. Both of you will be better off if you do.”

I shrug, and just continue eating. I don’t know why, but I don’t feel like talking about Baz anymore. Penny seemed to notice my mood shift. 

She gave me a reassuring smile and said, “Well, I have some good news. I talked to Agatha, and she said she’ll come to the party with us.” 

I had forgotten about Agatha for a while there. “Oh. Yeah, that sounds great.” 

“It’ll be fun, just like the old times.” 

“Sure,” I mumbled. It’ll be fun, except for the fact that the last time Agatha and I had talked it didn’t end well. 

I had told Penny about it, which caused her to roll her eyes and scold me for overreacting. Maybe I was, now looking back with what I know about Baz now. 

Penny noticed that I still wasn’t feeling great and pushed her plate towards me. My mood became instantly better. 

**Baz**

“I was at your practice today.”

It’s been quiet in our room for about an hour when Snow decides it's time to disturb the peace. 

I pretend I don’t hear him and continued reading my Elocution textbook. 

“I know you probably think that I was- that I was following you around but I wasn’t.”

I close my textbook. It’s apparent that Snow’s not going to stop talking anytime soon unless I respond. “It seemed like you were stalking me, Snow,” I sneer at him. “Which goes against our truce.” 

Snow lets out a frustrated growl. “I was _ not _ stalking you! I wanted to talk to you.” 

“About what, Snow?” For a second I imagine that he’s going to say that he wanted to tell me that he’s in love with me and just couldn’t wait to talk to me; then I realize that that would never happen and I’m a downright fool. 

“I wanted to- I, uh, wanted to talk about your mother.”

I narrow my eyes at him. “What about my mother?”

“That we haven’t done much research in the past week! We need to do more.” He dramatically throws his hands in the air. 

“We’ve all been busy, Snow. But I’ll have you know that I’ve still been reading the documents that we found in the library. Stop acting as if I’m abandoning my mother.” I snapped. I didn’t need him guilting me. I already felt guilty not being here when my mother visited.

“I didn’t- that’s not what I meant. I just- wouldn’t it be easier to find stuff if we work together? If I helped you, we can find Nicodemus faster.” 

“And Bunce,” I add.

“What?” He asks, confused. 

“If you and Bunce helped me.” 

“Yeah, Penny too,” he nods dismissively. “Show me the things that you found.” He walks over to my desk and tries to touch my things before I slap his hand away. He glares at me. 

“Are you really not gonna let me see the documents?”

“I didn’t say you couldn’t look at the documents, just keep your filthy hands off my desk.” 

“Fine.” Instead, he leans over my shoulders to look. I lean away from him, to make sure I don’t touch him, even though I want nothing more. I can feel his warmth radiate off of him, and his scent is filling up my nose. (Sour cherry scones and smoke.) 

I sit in silence as I wait for him to finish reading. I lasted another five minutes before I snapped. 

“How are you not done reading? Are you truly that slow that you can’t comprehend reading a single document?”

“I was just finishing up. No need to be such an arsehole.”

“Well?”

“What?” He turned to look at me, and we were nearly touching nose to nose. I leaned my head back to ensure I didn’t do anything hasty.

“Did you understand the documents or did you just want to waste my time?”

“Oh. Um. You had some good notes.” 

“Is that all you have to say?” I snap. He shrugs. I swear to Merlin, he’s trying to get me to fight him.

“I think we should meet up with Penny and have a proper sit down. We can have scones and tea again,” he said hopefully. 

“Crowley, Snow. Instead of wasting my time, why didn’t you just say you wanted to have a meet up between all of us?”

“I _ tried _! You keep running away everytime you see me outside of our room, and ignore me during classes. What’s wrong with you?”

“I do not run away from you.” I want to end this conversation now. For someone so thick, I can’t believe he’s figuring out my plan. 

“Yes you do! You don’t even taunt me in class when I mess up. Are you feeling ill?”

“Piss off, Snow,” I sneer at him. I get up from the desk and move towards my bed to get away from him. He doesn’t take the hint and follows me.

“Seriously, Baz. What are you plot- erm- what’s going on?”

I’m about to punch him. Maybe I could return his favor of a broken nose. “Have you ever considered Snow, that I’m trying to keep peace?” I hiss. “We're working together, and until our truce is over, we need to get along. So forgive me Snow, for trying to be civilized. It would be appreciated if you kept the promises you made of minding your own fucking business and letting me have some privacy.”

He looks at me doubtfully, as if he‘s not sure to believe me or not, but doesn’t push it. “Fine. I’m sorry.”

I raise my eyebrow at him. I didn’t actually expect him to back down, that stubborn git. “Wow, Snow, didn’t think you had it in you to actually apologize for your mistakes.”

“Piss off.” He sighs and sits down on his bed. “I really wasn’t trying to follow you. I just wanted to talk to you.”

“Sure.”

He glares at me. “It’s the truth.”

“Alright Snow, no need to get worked up.” 

He’s running a hand through his hair and messing his curls up, like he usually does when he’s nervous. I have an urge to reach out and smooth his curls down. “So.” 

“So what, Snow?”

“Can we have another meeting?”

Is that what he’s nervous about? “Sure. If Bunce is free tomorrow, we can meet here in the afternoon.”

“And we’ll have scones?” He’s looking at me with his eyes bright with hope. 

I suppress the smile threatening to spread on my face. “Yes, you nightmare, we’ll have scones.” 

He grins, and finally lays down in his bed.

“Alright, cool.”

Snow is going to be the end of me.

**Simon**

I tell Penny the plan for the afternoon at breakfast. 

“Good news,” I say. “Baz is free this afternoon, so we can do more research.”

“And who said _ I _was free?” Penny raises her eyebrows and pokes me. 

“Are you not?”

“I am, but it’d be nice if you asked me.”

“If you aren’t, we don’t have to.” 

“I am, I am. I’m just teasing Simon.”

I poke her back, and she laughs. 

From across the hall, I can see Agatha sitting by herself. She looks up from her breakfast and catches me staring. _ Shit _. I try to send her a friendly smile, but it comes out as sort of a grimace. She gives me a quick awkward smile in return and quickly looks back down to her food. I let out a low groan. “How am I supposed to go to a party with Agatha when she can’t even look at me.”

Penny rolls her eyes. “You have a couple of days till then. Try harder to be friendlier.” 

“I _ am _ trying.” Out of the corner of my, I can see Isaac once _ again _join Baz at his table. Everything about him irked me, and seeing him with Baz puts me off even more. I can feel my magic rising underneath my skin.

Penny pokes me again. “Control you magic, Simon.” 

“Sorry,” I mumble. I spend the rest of breakfast trying to focus my attention away from Agatha, and Baz and his friend.

* * *

When I enter our room after classes end, Baz is there writing things on the board. 

It’s the first time in a while where Baz has willingly been around me. (Besides nighttime. Even then, he ignores me.) 

He’s organizing the board into categories and there’s an intense look on his face, the one he always gets when he’s trying to concentrate. Some strands of hair have fallen out from his slicked back hair-do, and are now framing his face nicely. It’s fucking annoying that he always has to look good at every opportunity, even if it’s just writing notes.

Baz catches me staring at him from the door and sneers. “Do you need an invitation to come in?”

“No, that’s vampires Baz. You should know that.” I give him a knowing look. He doesn’t reply to my comment, but I can see his nostrils flare. 

“When’s Bunce getting here?”

“Soon. Hey, I thought we were going to have scones and tea.” I looked around the room to see if I missed sight of a tray.

“I have to go get them.”

“Well, can you get them now?” 

He turns from the board and glares at me. “Is your stomach really a bottomless pit?”

I shrug. “Penny’s gonna be here soon and I just think it’ll be rude to leave once she’s here.”

He huffs and puts down the marker. “Fine, you muppet, I’ll get them.” He gives me one last annoyed look before leaving. 

Penny arrives a few minutes after Baz leaves. “Where’s Baz?” She asks, sitting on his bed. He hates it when she does that, and she knows it.

“He’s gone to get tea. You shouldn’t sit there Pen, you know how pissed off he gets.”

“Well then he should have been here to stop me.” She squints at the board from her seat. “‘_ What we know and what we don’t.’” _She reads off the board. “Did Baz find anything new?” 

“Yeah, he has some notes and he found a couple articles.”

“Where are they?”

“Um, I think they’re on his desk. I’ll check.” As soon as I reach for the pile of papers on his desk. Baz walks in again with a tray.

“Didn’t I tell you to keep your hands off my desk?” He puts the tray on my empty desk and walks over to me and picks up the notes.

“I just wanted to show Penny your notes.”

“And you just couldn’t wait until I got back? You couldn’t resist the urge to go through my things like you did while I was gone.” Fuck. I didn’t know he realized.

“I-that’s not- it’s not the same thing.”

“How, pray tell, was it different?”

“Because you were gone! I was trying to find answers!”

“Next time, how about you mind you own fucking-“

“Alright, I think that’s enough,” Penelope interrupts. “How about we start going through your new findings, Baz?” I shoot Penny a grateful look. She always knows how to get things under control. 

Baz mutters something under his breath before looking at Penny. “Fine. But first, get the fuck off my bed, Bunce.”

* * *

After our little argument, the tension between us eases and the afternoon goes smoothly. We manage to make some progress. After about 2 hours of digging through articles, Penny announces that she has to do some work in her room before dinner, so we decide to wrap up for the day. 

Baz and I are left to reorganize the notes, which we do pretty quickly. I can feel the awkward silence creeping back into the room. Since we stopped fighting as much, there’s not much to say to each other. Sometimes it drives me crazy. I mean, it’s just so weird not to talk with someone that you live with.

I try to think of something to talk about to slow down the return of the silence. “Hey,” I say to him, my voice a bit too loud. “Did you hear?”

He looks at me like I’m an idiot, and for once I can’t blame him. I feel like an idiot, for trying to have a conversation with someone who’s supposed to be my enemy just because I sort of miss interacting (fighting?) with him. 

“About what, Snow?”

“Um. About the party. In the Wavering Woods.”

“Yes Snow, I did. Where exactly did _ you _hear about it?”

“Uh- I- Penny heard about it.” He doesn’t look like he believes me, but doesn’t point it out. 

“So,” I say, because Baz isn’t putting any effort in continuing our conversation. (If you can even call if that.)

“So what, Snow? Talk in complete sentences.”

“So, are you going to go?” 

“I might. What’s it to you?”

I shrug. “Just asking.”

“Why? Are you going to try to follow me around if I go?”

I roll my eyes. For Merlin’s sake, I already apologized to him about his football practice. It was just really wanted to talk to him. “Christ Baz, no. I already said that I wasn’t stalking you at your practice.”

“Sure.”

“I’m serious. I’m going, and I promise to not follow you, or whatever. So don’t worry about me if you wanna go.”

“Alright,” he says, nodding. It seems like he actually believes me.

“Alright.” I grin. This is one of the nicest conversations we’ve had. Is this how it would be like if we were just regular roommates? Would all of our conversation go as smoothly, and would end without a fight?

“Are we done here, Snow? Dinner started a few minutes ago, and I thought you’d be running to get there.”

I look at the clock and realize he’s right. “Oh, yeah, let’s go.” They were serving Shepherd's pie, and I wanted to get there early to make sure there was enough time for multiple helpings.

“_ Let’s _?” Baz echoes back at me. 

“Yeah. Aren’t you coming to dinner? We’re all done cleaning up so there’s no need for you to be late to dinner.” I held the door open, hoping he would get the message and he would come along. He still looked skinny, even though it had been a couple of weeks since he returned for who knows where. He needed to eat more, and going to dinner early would help. 

He stares at me, as if he’s trying to will me to leave. When he’s realizing that I’m not leaving until he is, he sighs and begrudgingly walks towards the door. I can’t believe he’s actually listening. It’s a small victory, really , but I still have to control my smile. 

Baz lags a few steps behind me as we walk down to the dining hall. I think he’s doing it on purpose, as if walking with me will ruin his reputation. 

Still, it’s the closest we’ve ever come to acting like normal roommates who can tolerate each other.

(It’s the closet we’ve come to acting like friends.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i think that this is probably my worst chapter? idk. it’s also my longest (nearly 4K words). i also only proof read this once bc i didn’t have the energy to do more times and i wanted to post this asap, so sorry for any grammar mistakes. I can’t make any promises on when the next chapter will be out, because when i do i usually end up updating months later. lemme know if you’re enjoying where this fic is going.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> welcome back! get ready for an interesting turn of events.

**Agatha **

“Come sit with us.” 

I look up from my plate and see Penny standing in front of me. She has her arms crossed and she has a determined look on her face. It’s the look that tells you that she won’t give up until she gets what she wants. Meaning, she wasn’t going to leave me alone until I went with her.

Still, I was going to at least try to stand my ground. “Why?”

“Because we’re friends, and friends sit together. Also, aren’t you lonely sitting by yourself?”

I can’t help but roll my eyes. “No I’m not lonely.”

“Well, I would still like to sit with my friend.”

“Can you even call this a friendship? We barely talk.”

“That’s because you and Simon broke up and you two decided that instead of dealing with it in a mature manner, you would awkwardly ignore each other.” I open my mouth to protest, but Penny cuts me off. “And we  _ are  _ friends. If I don’t have you, I’m down to 2 and a half friends.” 

I don’t know who her half-friend is, but I’m not curious enough to ask her. “Simon won’t want me to sit there.”

She raised her eyebrow. “It was Simon’s idea to go to the party. He wants to be friends again, I’m sure of it, and it’s best if you actually spent time together prior to the event so we can actually enjoy the party together.”

I hate admitting when Penny’s right. She always almost is, and it’s ridiculous. She’s a pusher, and she refuses to stop because she thinks she knows what’s best for everyone. 

“Fine,” I say, getting up and picking up my dinner plate. “I’ll join you.”

“Great,” Penny smiled, and walked back to her table. I followed begrudgingly. 

Simon wasn’t already seated, meaning he probably didn’t know that I was going to be there. There was probably going to be a big commotion when he got here. There’s always a big commotion if Simon is involved. 

Penny and I sit in silence. She’s reading some novel and absentmindedly taking bites of her dinner. I don’t touch mine. I’m too busy waiting for Simon’s reaction to the new sitting arrangement.

He arrives shortly, his plate piled high with roast beef. He doesn’t notice me until he’s comfortably seated and eating. He’s too distracted by his meal. 

When he finally looked at me, he nearly choked on his mouthful. 

“Hi, Simon.” Might as well get this over it. 

He looks at me wide eyed and an open mouth. After a few seconds he finally responds. “Hi Aggie.”

I don’t know what else to say, and Simon doesn't either. How are you supposed to talk to your ex after ignoring him for weeks?

Penny finally decides to speak up, thank Merlin. “Do you two want to do the Greek assignment together tomorrow afternoon? We can work outside on the front lawn. It’s supposed to be a lovely day.”

There’s a part of me that wants to decline, but I realize that if I say no, Penny will find others ways to make sure we spend time together. Also, maybe it’ll be nice to be around each other again. Without the pressure of being Simon’s girlfriend, I actually did enjoy some parts of our past friendship. If Simon doesn’t try to convince me to be his girlfriend again, I think we can all remain friends. “Sure. I haven’t started it yet.” 

“Great,” Penny says. “What about you Simon? I’m assuming you haven’t started it either.”

He looks offended by Penny’s statement. “No, I had other stuff to work on. 

“Right, so that means you can join us.” 

“What exactly do we have to do for the assignment?” Simon asks. 

Penny launches into a full on explanation of the work, and it somewhat feels like old times. 

**Simon**

I wasn’t expecting Agatha to sit with us tonight. After dinner, I try to get Penny to admit that she had to be involved in her decision to sit with us again, but all she says is that it was about time she came back. 

It did feel good to talk to Agatha again. I know she’s not ready to get back together with me, which is fine. I still want to be her friend. 

* * *

I’m waiting for Baz to come back from the Catacombs. For the past couple of days, we’ve been talking before bed. It’s not for a long time, and most of Baz’s side of conversation consists of snarky remarks, but it’s nice to actually get along with your roommate.

He seems to be taking his time tonight. I’m about ready to call it day when he comes back.

“Really took your time today, didn’t you Baz?” 

“Don’t recall asking for your input, Snow,” he shoots back, as he unlaces his trainers. 

“Just saying,” I shrugged. It’s quiet for a bit Baz took his jumper off. 

“You and Wellbelove make up?” Baz asks.

“What?”

“I said, did you and Wellbelove make up?”

“Um, not really, no. Why?”

“Nothing, just saw you two together at dinner. Just assumed that you two were right back on your path to your happily ever after.”

I think he’s trying to mock me, but there’s no real energy in it. He just sounds tired… and a bit sad? Which doesn’t make sense considering he told me that he didn’t actually want Agatha. I think I’m imagining it; it’s late and I’m about ready to knock out. I’m only still awake because of Baz.

“We just sat together. We’re not back together.”

“Yet.” Baz adds. 

“I don’t even know if she wants to get back together.” Crowley, I can’t believe I just admitted that to Baz. He’s probably going to use it against me.

Surprisingly, he doesn’t. “Don’t worry, Snow. You’ll get to live out your domestic fantasy with Wellbelove eventually,” he says, not looking at me and gripping his clothes tightly. 

“Yeah, uh, sure. I hope.” I mumble. I don’t know what to say. This is the nicest Baz has ever been to me. I’m pretty sure it’s a trick. Or maybe he actually meant that he was trying to get along with me. This was weird.

“Right, then,” he nods absentmindedly. “Night, Snow.” Before I can say anything back, he’s locked himself in the bathroom. 

So fucking weird. 

**Baz**

I knew that they would get back together. 

Yes, yes, Snow did say that they weren’t dating, but really, it's just a matter of time. 

I see them and Bunce on the front lawn the next day. He’s looking at her with a stupid smile, the kind that you have on when you were around the person you love. He would never look at me that way. 

To distract myself from the pity party my heart wants to throw, I try to find Dev and Niall. Unfortunately, both of them have to decide to fuck off to Merlin knows where.

However, I run into Isaac instead and decide to distract myself with his company. He’s more than happy to join me for tea.

He carries out most of our conversation, which I’m fine with. I’m still sulking over Snow.

Isaac’s talking about what he did over summer holidays. I’m only catching a few details as he goes on. Then, he starts talking about how he went to Barecelona for a week with a bloke he was dating. 

I’m suddenly snapped out of sulking and extremely aware of what Isaac is saying.

“Sorry,” I interrupt him. “Did you say the  _ bloke  _ you were dating?”

“Yes.” He narrowed his eyes. “Is that a problem?”

“No, no problem at all.” I almost laugh at the implication that  _ I’m  _ homophobic. “It's just surprising that you’re allowed to be open about, considering how the Old Families are rather traditional.”

“Yes, well, my parents don’t mind it as long I don’t tell everyone at gatherings. They’re not the most accepting, but it’s better than having to completely suppress myself.” I nodded in agreement. As someone with an unsupportive father, I sympathized with him. 

“So, are you still with him?”

“No. It was just a passing fancy.” 

I raised an eyebrow. “You traveled to another country with him.”

He grinned. “I was bored. Anyways, does it matter? It’s in the past. I think I’m interested in someone else now.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. Anyways. Oh, look,” he says quickly, not making eye contact with me. “Dev and Niall are here.”

“Nice of you to join us,” I sneered at them as they sit down. Neither of them looks fazed, which I blame on the years of friendship. “Where have you two been?” 

“Niall here tried to talk to Alice.” Dev said, patting an unhappy Niall on the back. “Poor lad could barely get two words out.”

“Who’s Alice?” Isaac asked. 

Niall opens his mouth to talk, but Dev cuts in. He presumably wants to tell the story with the embarrassing details that Niall would have left out. 

As Dev tells his exaggerated story and Niall protests, I let my mind wander about Isaac. Who was he interested in? And why did he tell me out of everyone? 

“Don’t worry, Niall,” Dev says. “The alcohol at the party will give you the confidence that you need to talk to her.”

Isaac perks up when he hears that. “You’re all coming to the party then?”

Dev nods. “Yeah. Can’t believe Baz agreed to come with us. He prefers to spend his Friday nights antagonizing the Chosen One or studying.” I flip him off.

Isaac laughs and turns to me, “So I guess I’ll be keeping you company tomorrow after all.” 

“I suppose you will.” 

**Simon**

I realized I had nothing to wear to the party right before I needed to get ready, and in a panic, send a bird to Penny to alert her of the emergency.

She had replied quickly, and told me she had a couple of shirts from her brothers. She said that she would come help me as soon as she was done ready. (She also yelled at me because the bird has been traveling so fast that it broke through her window.)

She follows through with her promise; in just ten minutes, she’s up in my room, dictating what I’ll be wearing this evening.

“I think you can wear those trousers you’re wearing, they’re fine. I honestly think this jumper will look best on you. I really like the color, don’t you, Simon?” 

I nod. I don’t really care what I’ll be wearing, I just know I can’t go in my uniform. Anything else will do. 

“Well then, go try it on.” Penny shoves the jumper in my arms, and pushes me towards the bathroom. 

She grins when I come out. “It looks nice on you. Now, we have to wait for Agatha.” She checks her watch and sighs. “Which is probably going to talk another half hour.” 

I stared at her. “ _ What.  _ Why would it take her so long?”

Penny shrugs. “You know her. She likes to take her time.” She flops down my bed “I told her that I would be here, so she’ll send a bird when she’s ready.”

I sigh and sit next to her. While we wait, Penny starts talking to me about some book about bonding rituals from the 18th century. I try to understand and keep up with what Penny is saying, but I can’t. This seems like a topic that Baz would have much more interest in than me. 

Speaking of Baz, I hadn’t seen him in hours. I knew he would be going to the party because he told me, but I had no idea where he currently was. I hope he still comes to a party. I had never seen him in that kind of environment; it would be interesting. 

The bird arrived in a half hour, just like Penny has said. Agatha told us to meet her at the drawbridge, and off we went. 

**Baz**

If I had to watch Niall fuss over his hair and clothes any longer, I’m going to off myself.

I had decided to get dressed and come to Dev and Niall’s room so we could go to the party together. Usually I’m the one who takes the most time on their appearance, so imagine my surprise when I come to find Niall barely dressed, having a full on panic attack about how he would wear his hair . Apparently he liked Alice more than he let on, and this event was very important to him.

I tried to be a good friend and help him pick an outfit and fix his hair, but after 15 minutes of arguing with him, I decided that unless Niall wanted me to knee him in the stomach for refusing to listen to me, I should let him make his own decisions. 

“C’mon, mate, let’s go, it’s getting late. You look fine.” Dev complained loudly.

“Yes, you look very presentable. You’ll be fine.” I said. (I was lying. Niall looked like he was going to piss himself. But that wasn’t the fault of his clothes, it was his lack of self esteem and confidence.)

“Yeah, alright. I think we can go now.” Niall said, shakily. 

“Great, let’s get a move on it then,” Dev said, me and him already halfway out the door. Niall followed behind closely.

* * *

Snow’s already here, and he looks brilliant. 

I think this is the first time I’ve ever seen him out of his uniform. He’s wearing a blue jumper that brings out his eyes. He’s standing with Wellbelove and Bunce, shuffling his feet. He can never stand still. 

He spots me immediately, and marches towards me until we’re face to face. 

“Baz,” he breathes out.

“Snow.”

“You’re- you’re wearing jeans.” 

Well that certainly not what I was expecting. “I am. What an excellent observation. 

“You’ve never- I’ve never seen you in jeans.” 

“That’s because I can’t exactly wear jeans at Watford, can I?” I don’t know why we’re talking about my jeans out of everything to discuss. I know Snow’s terrible at conversing with people (especially me), but I didn’t realize he was so terrible that he thought this was an appropriate topic. 

“Uh, yeah, you’re right.” He nodded. “So, do you wanna get a-“ 

“Baz!” I hear someone call. I turn around to Isaac smiling at me. “Hi.”

“Hello, Isaac.” I turn back around to excuse myself to Snow, but before I say anything he scowls and stomps away like a child. 

“You came,” he says. 

“Well I said I would, didn’t I?”

“Just thought you might change your mind last minute. Glad you didn’t.” 

“Mhm, I hope I made the right decision. It doesn’t seem like much fun yet.” Around me, people are huddled in small groups, drinking, and there’s a bonfire going. I can barely hear the music. 

“That’s because nobody’s drunk yet. Just wait. Let’s get you a drink, yeah?” 

**Simon**

Fucking Isaac. I know Penny will make fun of me if I brought it up again, but I seriously think he’s obsessed with Baz. I  _ know  _ he saw me talking to Baz, and yet he still decided to interrupt us. What a prick. 

I mean, yeah we weren’t exactly important; we were talking about his jeans for Crowley’s sake. I wanted to have a real conversation with him, but the only thing that was on my mind when I saw him was his jeans. 

Christ, his jeans. I’ve never seen him wear anything that casual, if you can call those designer jeans casual. (Posh twat) They looked snug and tight, and fit him perfectly. Nobody else I met looked that good in jeans. 

So really, you couldn’t blame me for talking about them. And then, the second that I was about to offer to get him a drink, Isaac came in. Right when I was going to stop blubbering about jeans and do something useful for Baz, he decided to steal Baz. 

Now the two of them are standing far away from me, drinking and talking. Isaac says something that causes Baz to laugh loudly. It's a sight to behold. Baz never allows himself to show emotions. He must be drunk then; I saw him down a few drinks, and I guess it’s catching up to him.

“Stop staring at Baz, Simon.” Penny says to me. 

“I’m not,” I mumble. Penny rolls her eyes. 

“Yes you are. You told me you wanted to come to have fun. How can you have fun when all you do is watch Baz?” 

“I am having fun, Pen. See?” I lift the drink in my hand. 

“Not really. It looks like Baz is having more fun than you, which seems like it should be impossible.” She’s right. It sounds crazy. 

“Fine, what’d you want to do?” 

“Come dance with me and Agatha,” she said, tugging on my arm. 

I throw one last glance at Baz, who’s smiling and leaning on Isaac's shoulder. They’re closer than ever. I let Penny tug me away. 

**Baz **

Isaac was right. All that was needed to make the night fun was a couple of drinks. Everyone seems to be properly sloshed, and it’s gotten much more lively. 

I’m also on my way to get drunk. I’ve had a couple, and the only thing that’s keeping me stable is Isaac at my side. Dev and Niall are already drunk, and Niall is busy trying to woo Alice, who doesn’t seem impressed. The alcohol was making him act like arse.

Snow’s been watching me. I can feel his eyes on me all night. I’ve ignored him thus far, until I see him dancing. 

He seems to be having the time of his life. He’s dancing closely with Bunce and Agatha. He has the worst dance moves in the world, but he looks so carefree and energetic that it doesn’t matter. 

I let myself soak him in. He’s so alive it’s ridiculous. 

He’s just dancing with Wellbelove now. Bunce seems to have tapped out, and now he’s spinning Wellbelove around. She’s laughing and Simon looks at her with such glee that my heart constricts. I have to force myself to look away. 

I think it’s time for another drink.

**Simon **

I can’t remember the last time I danced with Agatha and had fun. She usually hates dancing with me, because I end up stepping on her feet. But that’s because I can’t do formal dancing. Right now, we’re just having fun, and it feels great. 

There’s no pressure to be anything or do anything. Right now, I’m not Simon Snow, Chosen One, savior of the mages, and Agatha’s not my girlfriend and destiny.

Right now, I’m just Simon, and Agatha’s just my friend. 

It feels good to be friends with Agatha. 

The song changes to something I don’t know, and Agatha pulls me to the side. 

“I think that’s enough dancing for the night, don’t you? I’m knackered.” Agatha says to me, and I nod along, trying to catch my breath. We’ve been dancing for longer than I realized. 

“Simon,” Agatha says, turning towards me. She puts a hand on my arm. She has a serious look in her eyes, all of sudden.

“Yeah?”

“I just want to say… I really do like being your friend. I know you wanted to get back together, but I think we’re better off as friends. These past few days, I think it’s been the nicest time we spend together.” 

I don’t know what to say. It  _ has  _ been the nicest time we’ve spent together. I think we’ve talked more in the past few days than we did in the last month of our relationship. 

“So you see, I think that if we stay just friends, it'll be good for the both of us.” 

I don’t say anything for a minute. I do want to be friends with Agatha. I don’t want to lose her again. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I agree.” 

Agatha gives me a genuine smile and squeezes my arm. “Oh Simon, I knew you would get it. I’m really glad we can be friends.” I nod and smile. 

“I’m going to go say hello to Trixie. Seriously Simon, I’m so glad we talked and worked this out.” She kissed my cheek and walked away, leaving me to absorb what just happened.

**Baz**

_ I fucking knew it,  _ I think to myself as I watch Simon and Wellbelove stare into others eyes.  _ I knew they would get back together.  _

There’s a small part of me that’s saying that it’s not confirmed yet, that I should jump to conclusions. 

But then Wellbelove kisses him, and it’s like a stab to my heart. 

“You alright, mate?” Isaac says. He looks concerned. 

“I’m great. Everything’s great. I think I need another drink though,” I say looking down at my empty cup. I’ve lost count of how many I’ve had. 

“I don’t think so. I think you’ve had enough. I think you and I should go cool off.” He pushes me away from the party to more secluded areas of the woods. You can still hear the music and laughter. 

“I thought I would get you out of there before something happened. You look like you want to kill someone.” Isaac explained. “Did Simon do something to piss you off?” 

“What makes you say that?” 

“Because you were looking at him like he did something horrible to you.” 

“His existence is horrible enough, he doesn’t need to do anything.” He gives me a small concerned smile. 

“Well, you know, if you want to talk about something, you can tell me. Really, anything.” 

“Alright.”

“I think you might be one of my best friends,” he continues. “I’ve never- I’ve never felt this close to anyone before.” He’s giving me this intense, earnest look, and something finally clicks. 

I kiss him. 

I’ve never kissed anyone before, so I don’t really know what I’m doing. I’ve never wanted to kiss anyone but Simon, but he clearly doesn’t want me. He and Wellbelove belong together, and I can’t do anything about that. 

So I kiss Isaac, who’s eagerly responding, and let him distract me.

He might not be Simon, but he’s warm, and he actually wants me, and that’s enough. 

So, I let myself be happy for once. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> dun dun dun. im assuming y’all saw the isaac and baz thing coming. let me know what you think of them, or just leave any thoughts, feelings, and concerns in the comments. also, gonna admit, i once again did not spend too much time editing bc i was in a rush to post this chapter today.  
edit: just wanted to tell you guys that i won’t be updating until my exams are over, which is after the 20th, sorry


	9. Chapter 9

**Simon**

Out of the corner of my eye, I can see Isaac leading Baz away from the party and deeper into the woods. He can’t be up to any good.

“Do you see that?” I whisper furiously to Penny, who had come to sit with me once Agatha left. 

“Did I see what?” 

“Isaac. He’s forcing Baz to go somewhere with him.” Penny raised her eyebrows at me. 

“It didn’t look forced to me. Baz went pretty easily.” 

“What do you think they’re doing?”

“I don’t know, Si. It’s not my business or yours.” 

“It is my business. Baz is my roommate and I have to look out for him.” Penny looks like she’s trying to hide a smile. “What?”

“Nothing! Just that…. you seem awfully worried about Baz’s wellbeing. How sweet.” 

I can feel myself turning red. “It’s not- you don’t- I’m not! I don’t care about him, I just- we’re working together so I’m forced to know things about him, like where he is.”

“Okay, Simon. Whatever you say,” Penny says dismissively. I don’t think she believes me. 

“I think we should go after them.”

“Absolutely not.”

“But Penny-“

“No Simon, I’m not stalking Baz at a party. Isaac is his friend, not an evil villain. They’re not plotting anything.”

“I didn’t say that they were  _ plotting _ . It’s just weird that they’re missing out on the party.” Penny glares at me. 

“You’re staying here. With me.” 

“Fine!” I sit myself down. I’m suddenly not in the party mood. 

* * *

It’s been 10 minutes since Baz and Isaac disappeared into the woods, and they’re still not back. It’s driving me mad, not knowing what they’re doing. 

“Penny I can’t just sit here. I’m gonna go look for him.” I stand up and sort myself out. I needed to find Baz. 

“Simon!” I've already begun walking in the direction I saw them go. Penny’s running after me.

“It’s okay Penny, you don’t have to come with me if you don’t want to.”

“Of course I’m coming with you. I still think this is stupid though.” I smile at her. “Thanks Pen.”

“I don’t know why you care so much.” Penny mutters to me. I don’t answer. I don’t know why I care either. 

As we walk, I begin to see two figures. I think they’re Isaac and Baz, but they’re standing so closely that I can’t exactly tell.

“I think that’s them, Penny.” I try walking closer, but Penny’s grabbed my shoulder and yanked me back. She has an unpleasant look on her face.

“What’s wrong?” 

“I don’t think they’re up to anything that concerns us.” I try to get her to let go of me but she refuses. “Penny, let me go talk to him.”

“Simon, are you blind?” She snaps. “They’re too occupied with each other’s mouths to give you the time of day right now.”

“What are you talking about?” Penny gives a pitying look. “Look closely, Si.”

I turn back my head and look again. I have no idea what she’s trying to- oh. 

Penny sees my face and sighs. “Let’s go.” 

I let her pull me away without protest. There’s too much going through my head to do or say anything. 

**Penny**

I decide to take Simon back to his room. People had begun leaving the party, and I doubted Simon wanted to stick along till the end, considering the way that he completely deflated when he saw Isaac and Baz. 

I can’t say I’m surprised about Baz. I don’t like to stereotype people, but it was a bit odd that Baz could’ve gotten with any girl in our year and never did. 

Simon’s completely silent as we walk up the tower. I can’t tell what’s going through his head or what he’s feeling. How is one supposed to react to seeing his archenemy turned investigative partner making out with a guy in the woods?

He’s still quiet once we’re in the room. He sits down on his bed and does nothing. I decide it’s finally time to break the silence.

“You okay, Simon?” He looks up at me, dazed.

“Are you okay?” I repeat. 

“Yeah, I guess. I just- I don’t get it.”

“Get what?”

“Why him?” I don’t know what he’s talking about.

“Why Isaac? Out of all people why did he ki- why does he want to be with Isaac?” 

I shrug. “I don’t know. He seems pretty nice. He’s also kind of hot.” 

“What? How can you say that? What about Micah?” He snaps. He’s beginning to look pissed off. 

“I’m just saying that,  _ objectively _ , he’s attractive. I’m not going to go cheat on Micah with him, if that’s what you’re implying.” Also, I don’t think I’m Isaac’s type, considering what I now know about him.

“I don’t think so. He’s definitely not “hot” enough for Baz.” I don’t know where Simon is going with this, but I don’t think it’s a good idea to interrupt him in his state. 

“I mean, look at Baz. He’s too good for Isaac. It made sense when he was running after Agatha, because they’re both fit. But- it doesn’t make sense that he wants to be with Isaac. He’s out of his league.”

“Um, well maybe, Baz isn’t just going for Isaac for his looks,” I say carefully. Simon’s getting worked up now, and something’s beginning to click in my head. 

“Well he’s not going for his personality either. Baz is good at everything. Have you heard him play the violin? He doesn’t even have to try to be good at things, he just is. What is Isaac good at?” He’s begun pacing, and his magic is filling up the room.

“Simon, you need to calm down.” I walk towards him and force him to sit down again. “I thought you would be happy about this. If Baz is with Isaac, it means he won’t chase after Agatha.”

“Agatha doesn’t want to be with me. She told me she just wants to be friends tonight.”

“Oh. What did you tell her when she said that?” He shrugs. “I told her it’s fine.”

“That’s great. I always thought you two would be better off as friends.” He just shrugged again.

“Well, Baz getting a boyfriend can still be a good thing. Maybe he’ll be less uptight now.” I joke, trying to lighten the mood. Unfortunately, it has the opposite effect on him, and he looks even more frazzled. 

“You think they’re actually gonna date? You think they’re going to be in a relationship?” He says with wide eyes.

“Well I don’t know for sure, but maybe.” He’s up again, and shaking his head.

“No, they can’t. It just doesn’t make sense.”

“ _ Why  _ doesn’t it make sense, Simon?” 

“Because! He’s not good enough for Baz. Baz isn’t supposed to be with someone like him.”

“Then who’s he supposed to be with?”

“I- I don’t know. Not him though. I don’t trust him.”

“You seem awfully concerned for Baz, for someone who claims not to be his friend.” 

“I’m forced to be concerned about him, I don’t want to be. Why are you acting like I’m the one who’s acting odd and not Baz?”

_ Maybe because  _ you're  _ the one who just spent half an hour explaining how you think Baz is fit and out of Isaac’s league  _ I think to myself. It’s almost like- it’s almost like he’s jealous. 

Oh my god. I can’t believe I didn’t connect the dots before. 

Oh Simon. You don't even know it, but you're angry and jealous for the wrong reasons. 

**Simon **

Penny leaves after a bit, and I don’t know what to do with myself.

I can’t stop thinking about Baz. I knew there was a reason why I didn’t trust Isaac. He didn’t actually want to be friends with Baz, he wanted to date him. Bastard. 

I try to stay up and wait for Baz. I want to confront him about Isaac and tell him that I don’t trust him. He probably won’t listen to me because he’s a stubborn prat, but I need to try. 

I can’t wrap my head around the idea of Baz being in a relationship, let alone a relationship with  _ Isaac.  _ He belonged with someone more powerful and interesting. 

* * *

I accidentally fell asleep while trying to wait for Baz. In my defense, I was up pretty late waiting for him. 

When I wake up, Baz is sleeping peacefully and the sun is shining brightly through the window. 

I considered waiting for him to wake up before I went to breakfast so I could talk to him, but I realized that I was going to miss breakfast if I did so. 

Baz doesn’t show at breakfast, but Isaac does. He doesn’t sit with Dev and Niall, though, and ends up sitting by himself. 

Maybe he’s sitting by himself because things didn’t work out between him and Baz. I knew Baz was too smart to fall for Isaac.

I suddenly feel a lot better.

**Baz**

I feel like utter shite.

I can’t remember how many drinks I had last night, but it was clearly too many. 

I try to recall events from the previous night as I get dressed, but I’m having a hard time. 

I can clearly remember most of last night until I saw Simon and Agatha dancing together. After that, the night blurs together; I try my best to remember specifics but I can’t.

Until I catch a glimpse of myself sporting a hickey in the mirror, and all the memories come crashing back.

_ Fuck.  _ I can’t believe I kissed Isaac. I really shouldn’t have, it’s not fair to him. I’ll always be in love with Simon, and I can’t just lead Isaac on. 

I think about what happened last night and try to figure out a way to talk to Isaac today. I decide to skip breakfast, so I don’t have to talk to him until I know what I’m going to say. (I don’t have classes with him today, which will make it easier to avoid him.) 

We snogged for an hour, until I sobered up slightly and decided that it was time to leave. I told him that I would talk to him later, and then I went to the Catacombs and drained one too many rats to distract myself from everything that had happened. 

I’m going to have to talk to him today, even though I haven’t got a clue about what I’m going to say. 

But I don’t have time to dwell right now. I’ve missed breakfast, and I’m going to miss class if I don’t leave. I cast a glamour on my neck (seriously though, how the fuck do I have a hickey? It shouldn’t be possible with me being a vampire) and head out of the room.

* * *

I send a bird to Isaac’s room after classes are over. I tell him to meet me in my room so we can talk. 

Snow left our room to practice his sword fighting skills elsewhere after I chastised him, so I know I have some time before he gets back to talk to Isaac. 

He arrives shortly after Snow leaves. He gives me a kind smile as he sits, which only makes me feel worse about what I’m going to do. 

I try to start the conversation but I don’t know how. Luckily, Isaac does.

“You weren’t at breakfast this morning,” he starts.

“Yes, I wasn’t feeling my best this morning and woke up late.” He smiles warily at me.

“Oh. I thought you might have been avoiding me, because of what happened.” I didn’t realize he was going to get right to the point, but I guess I suppose I have no choice but to address him directly now.

“Right, about that. I’m sorry I kissed you. I was very drunk and I wasn’t thinking. It was wrong of me. And I know you were also drunk. Neither of us were in the right state of mind.”

Isaac frowns at me. “Are you trying to tell me what happened last night was a mistake? Because if so, I would rather you just do it instead of dragging this out.”

“I’m not saying it was a mistake,” I snapped. I’m trying to not get irritated, but it’s hard. “I’m saying that it wasn’t right of me to take advantage of you.” 

Isaac snorted. “You didn’t take ‘advantage’ of me. I knew what was happening. I like you and that’s why I kissed you back.” Oh.

“I thought you might have felt the same way,” he continued. “But it’s becoming clear that you don’t.”

“I never said that.” I snap again.

“Oh so you do feel the same? Is that why you’re trying to let me down right now?”

“It’s not as simple as you’re making it out to be.”

“Then explain!” He said exasperatedly. 

“I might… feel the same for you, but I also fancy someone else.” Crowley, I really hate talking about my feelings.” 

“Okay.” He shrugged.

“ _ Okay _ ? What do you mean ‘okay’?” 

“I mean it’s fine if you also fancy someone else. It’s not like we're getting married, we can keep things casual. I would still like to date you.” 

“So you don’t mind?”

“Not really. I mean unless you’re in a serious relationship with that person. Are you?”

“No I’m not. They don’t feel the same,” I say bitterly. “I just thought I should tell you before anything else happened. It would be wrong of me to lead you on like that.”

“Well it’s our final year. Let’s just have fun, no string attached.”

I think about it for a moment. I would always Snow, yes, but he was never going to love me back. In fact, after our truce, he was going to have to murder me. But right now, Isaac wanted me, and he didn’t care that I had feelings for Snow. He just hoped that we could have “fun.” And I hadn’t had fun for a very long time now. 

“Alright. No strings attached.” Isaac's eyes lit up and he grinned at me. 

“Great, that’s great.” He walked towards me, until we were mere centimeters apart. 

“Baz- can I kiss you?” He said quietly. 

I nodded and leaned in.

**Simon **

Baz kicked me out for swordfighting in our room and told me to practice outside. 

I was on my way to practice in the woods when Penny stopped me. 

“Hey Simon- Merlin, put that thing away!” Penny shouted, jumping away from me. I had accidentally swung my sword at her out of surprise. 

“Sorry, Pen,” I said sheepishly, sheathing the sword. “What’s up?”

“Oh, nothing. We just haven’t properly talked all day. Just wanted to catch up. How are you?” She said inspecting me closely.

“Fine?” I don’t know why she was looking at me like that.

“I was just wondering, because you weren’t feeling well last night.” She gave me a knowing look that caused my face to heat up.

“I’m- I’m fine, seriously. I had too much to drink, that's why I was acting odd.”

“If you say so,” she said. “How’s Baz? Any updates about him and Isaac?”

“No,” I shook my head. “I don’t think it worked out. Isaac was sitting all by himself today, didn’t you see?” I’m trying not to smile.

“No, no I didn’t. I’ll take your word for it, though. Sorry, you were on your way to somewhere, weren’t you?”

“Yeah I was going to practice sword fighting.”

“Well don’t let me keep you any longer. I’ll see you at dinner.” 

“See you,” I said. Penny gave my arm a squeeze before we part ways again. 

* * *

I spend half an hour practicing before I wear myself off. I feel tired and hungry. I should’ve eaten more lunch.

I head back up to our room. When I enter, I see Isaac’s sitting on Baz’s bed. 

He notices me and smiles. “Alright, Simon?”

“Where’s Baz?” I demanded. 

“He’s in the bathroom.” 

“Why are you here?” As Isaac opened his mouth to respond, Baz re-entered the room.

“Don’t worry, Snow, we were just leaving,” Baz said cooly. 

“Where are you going?” I said angrily. I thought whatever happened between the two of them was in the past and I wouldn’t have to worry. Apparently I was wrong.

“None of your business, Snow,” Baz sneered. Before I could say anything, Baz grabbed Isaac’s arm and left the room. 

* * *

After Baz left, I had to force myself to calm down. My magic had begun leaking, and smoke was filling the room. If I didn’t take control of my magic soon, the whole room would set fire.

It was hard. I was just so angry. I couldn’t believe that Baz would actually be with Isaac. He just didn’t seem like Baz’s type.

I’m still a bit angry as I head to dinner, but I’ve gotten a control of my magic. 

Baz nor Isaac are in the dining hall when I get there, which is good because I’m not in the mood to see either of them. I spot Penny already at our table and practically run to her. 

“I was wrong.” I say rushedly. 

Penny looks at me, completely lost. “What?”

“I was wrong. About Baz and Isaac. He-They- when I got to our room, he was there. Isaac, I mean. And him and Baz- they just- when I got there, they ran away.” 

Penny doesn’t say anything for a minute. Then she looks at me thoughtfully and says, “So?”

“I- what do you mean ‘so’?”

“What do you want me to say, Simon?” 

“I just- it’s weird! I don’t think they should date. I don’t trust Isaac.”

“Isaac has never given you a reason not to trust him, you’re just paranoid.”

“I’m not paranoid. The fact that he wanted to be friends with someone like Baz is enough reason to not trust him.”

“Well there was a clear reason why he wanted to befriend Baz,” Penny waggles eyebrows suggestively, and I could feel my face heating up. 

“So you agree, Isaac was only friends with Baz because of his ulterior motives, and should not be trusted because he’s a manipulative bastard.” I don’t think anything I just said makes sense, but I need Penny to understand why I don’t like him.

“Simon, how the fuck do you come up with these mental theories? Just leave them alone. Baz is not a child, he does not need you to chase Isaac down because you think he’s untrustworthy.”

Deep down, I know Penny’s right, but I can't just walk away from Baz.

“Simon,” Penny says slowly. “Do you think there might be any other reason you don’t want them together?”

“What’d you mean?”

“I mean, besides Isaac being untrustworthy, according to you, is there any other reason why you don’t think they should be together?”

“Nah, I just don’t trust him.”

“Well, if that’s the only reason, I suggest you just leave them alone.”

“Would you actually listen to me if I had other reasons?”

She glares at me. “Maybe if they were logical.”

I try to come up with other reasons why they don’t belong together, but most of the other reasons boil down to the fact that I just don’t want to watch them together. It makes me sort of feel sick, thinking about them as a couple.

**Penny**

I just want to tell him. He can be so oblivious sometimes, and I don’t know how long it’s going to take him to realize that the reason that he doesn’t want Isaac to be with Baz is because  _ he  _ wants to be with Baz.

I can’t believe I didn’t realize it before. It’s so  _ obvious.  _ Simon’s always been obsessed with Baz. And sometimes, they way he would complain about Baz was so weird. Like he would go on and on about how suspicious it was that Baz always looked good, and we should probably look into it. Looking back, a lot of the things he said about Baz should have told me that he was attracted to him.

And I had a feeling that it wasn’t exactly one-sided. I had caught Baz staring at Simon several times when he thought no one was looking. I used to think he was looking at Agatha but it was clearly Simon.

I wish I could just tell Simon about his own feelings. I don’t know how long it’s going to take him to realize, considering how he’s convinced that Isaac being “untrustworthy” is the only reason he doesn’t want them together.

Merlin, I really just want to tell Simon, but I know I can’t. 

I’m just going to have to see how this unravels.

**Baz**

After Snow had shown up to our room, Isaac and I went to his room. 

We decided to skip dinner at the dining hall, and instead I grabbed sandwiches from Cook Pritchard. 

We stayed in his room, snogging and then eating. It was nice; I had never been that close to anyone and it felt good. 

I had to leave eventually. Isaac’s roommate would be back soon, and we decided that it was best for both of us if people didn’t find out about us. After all, it wasn’t a serious relationship. 

When I get to the room, Snow’s pacing between our beds, looking slightly insane.

“Quit that, Snow, you look deranged.” His head snaps up towards and he stops.

“Where were you? You weren’t at dinner.”

“Why? Were you worried about me?” I say, amused.

“No,” he snapped. “Just thought it was very odd how fast you ran away earlier. Seemed suspicious.”

“I thought you were done accusing me of plotting,” I sneered. I really did think he stopped. We’d been getting along better. I didn’t know why he was acting so weird right now.

“I’m not. I’m just wondering why you won’t tell me where you went earlier.”

“Because it’s none of your business, Snow. I wasn’t doing anything that would interest you.”

“Were you with Isaac?” He says, as folding across his chest. 

I’m taken aback. “What does he have to do with anything?” 

“You  _ were  _ with him. I saw you leave the room with him, and you must have been with him for the past few hours. Both of you were missing at dinner.”

“Even if I was, it shouldn’t concern you. He’s my friend.”

“ _ Just  _ your friend?,” he asks, and my heart stops. Surely there’s no way he knows. 

“What are you implying, Snow?” 

“I saw you two in the woods!” He shouts, and I freeze. I suddenly feel ill. 

“Did- did you follow me?” I try my best to sound unfazed, but I’m filled with anger and shock. 

“I- I didn’t mean to. I was- I- I went to look for you, and I- I saw you two- I saw two- doing that.” He turns redder and redder as he talks. 

“Fuck you, Snow.” I have an urge to break something. That something being Snow’s face.

“It was an accident. I saw you walk away with Isaac- and I thought- I thought-“

“You thought what, Snow? You thought that instead of minding your own business, you needed to get involved in my personal life, even when I’ve asked countless times not too?”

“I don't trust Isaac! I thought it was weird that he was taking you away from the party-“

“Well you should’ve have minded your own fucking business.”

“I- I know, but-“

“No, Snow, you don’t get to stutter your way out of a mess that you created. You had no right.”

“I know! But I was just worried! That’s why I went to look for you. I don’t think you should date Isaac. He doesn’t seem like he should be trusted.”

“Snow,” I growl. “For the last fucking time, my personal life is none of your fucking business. Stay out of it.”

“Can I just ask you one question?” He says, and I want to rip his throat out. I’ve never wanted to hurt him more.

“No,” I say. I want to leave the room again, but it’s late and I can’t. 

“Are you actually dating him?” He asks me, and he has this look on his face. It’s almost like he’s disgusted. I didn’t think Snow was homophobic, but his body language says other wise. 

The urge to fight him leaves my body, and suddenly I feel drained. 

I didn’t come back to our room to fight. I had had a nice evening with Isaac, and I thought I would go to bed happy. 

Instead, I feel like shite and want nothing more to run away from Snow right now and hide. 

I mutter one last “fuck you, Snow” at him and quietly go to lock myself in bathroom so I don’t have to show Snow how much he’s hurt me.

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys, sorry for the late update. I had exams and they just ended. I wrote this chapter as quick as I can. Not my best, but I’m blaming that on time. Anyways, let me know what you think in the comments!


	10. Chapter 10

**Simon **

Baz is in the bathroom for a long time. I think he’s purposefully not coming out, and it’s my fault.

I didn’t think it would escalate like that. I was going to try to talk to him calmly, but it all went to shite. Then again, it wasn’t entirely my fault. He started yelling at me too.

I think he’s waiting for me to go to sleep before he comes out, but if he expects me to just fall asleep like that after we’ve fought he’s wrong. I need to talk to him to make sure we’re alright. I don’t wanna go back to ignoring each other like before.

I’m right about to doze off when Baz finally comes out of the bathroom. I quickly sit up and say, “Baz.”

He glares at me. “I thought you would be asleep by now.” 

“I was waiting for you. We didn’t- um. I wanted to talk to you.” He keeps glaring at me. I think he’s considering going back into the bathroom.

“I don’t want to talk to you, Snow.” He says and finally moves towards his bed. “We’ve talked enough.”

“But you didn’t answer my question. You just walked away.”

“Maybe I didn’t answer your question because I don’t _ want _to answer your question. Especially considering that it’s none of your business.”

I huff. I want him to tell me if he’s dating Isaac. But I know if I push him again he might just leave. “Then you could have said that. You didn’t have to be so dramatic.” 

Baz sneers at me. “Right, because you’re known for being able to let things go. If I told you I didn’t want to answer your question, you would keep pushing me because you don’t know how to respect anyone’s privacy, especially mine.” 

“That’s not- I wouldn’t have pushed you.” Okay, maybe I would. But maybe I wouldn’t; he didn’t even say anything to me, he just walked away, so there’s no knowing.

“Sure, Snow,” he said, climbing into his bed. “Whatever you say.” 

“Baz-“ 

“Snow, I don’t want to speak to you anymore. I’m tired. Let me sleep, for fuck’s sake.” He really did sound tired. I guess we’ll just have to talk more tomorrow then. 

“Okay. Goodnight, Baz.” 

He didn’t reply. He just turned away from me, facing the wall.

**Baz **

I wake up before Snow. 

I didn’t sleep well last night. All I could think about was Snow’s face when he asked me if I was dating Isaac. He looked like the idea of me being with anyone was revolting. Like it was incomprehensible. 

I got ready as quickly as I can. I wanted to leave before he woke up. I had a feeling that he would want to continue our conversation from last night, and I really didn’t have it in me to do so. 

As I made my way down the tower, I wondered if I could meet up with Isaac before breakfast. 

**Simon**

Baz is gone when I wake up. I’m not surprised. He’s good at avoiding me right when I want to talk to him. Arsehole. 

Agatha’s already sitting at Penny and I’s regular table when I get down to the dining hall. Since she started talking to us again she’s been sitting with us semi regularly for meals. 

She smiles at me when I sit down. “Good morning, Simon.” 

“Morning.” I mumble. I didn’t feel like talking, unless it was with Baz. 

Penny arrived shortly after me. “Morning, you two.” 

“Morning, Pen.” Agatha says. I just nod at her.

“So, do guys have any plans for today?” Penny says, before taking a bite of her eggs. 

“Not really,” Agatha replies.” “The only thing I have today is lacrosse practice. It starts in a bit.” Agatha checks her watch. “Crowley, I should actually get going. It starts in 10 minutes.”

“Oh. Well, we’ll see you later then.” 

“Bye, Pen. Bye, Simon.” Agatha says quickly as she gathers her things and leaves. 

“So,” Pen says, turning to me. “What’s wrong?”

I never know how she always knows when something is wrong with me. “How do you know something’s wrong?” 

“Well you look miserable. I’m assuming whatever is causing this misery has to do with Baz.” Merlin. Is it that obvious?

“I tried to talk to him last night, and we fought.” Penny sighs. 

“Was it about Isaac?” I nodded. “Simon, I _ told _you to leave them alone.”

“I know, but I just wanted to know for sure if they were dating. I tried to ask him calmly, but it didn’t work.”

Penny gave me a look. “Did you tell Baz you didn’t trust Isaac?” 

“...Maybe. Also, it might have slipped out that I caught them in the woods.” 

Penny sighed again. “Well then how can you blame him for being mad? You told him that that guy he likes shouldn’t be trusted and that you were stalking him at the party.”

“I wasn’t stalking him.” I snapped. “I was just making sure he was okay. Stop exaggerating it.” 

“_ Fine _, sorry.” Penny threw her hands up defensively. 

Talking to Penny just made me feel worse about the Baz thing. I think I might have fucked up royally, and destroyed the little peace that we had established not very long ago.

“What’d you think I should, Pen? I don’t want him to be mad at me forever. We still have to work together.” 

“Maybe you should apologize to him. And also stop talking badly about Isaac. People don’t usually like it when others talk badly about the people they date.” 

“Well there’s still no confirmation that they’re dating,” I say quickly. After all, Baz didn’t answer me last night.

“Well they look pretty cozy together,” Penny says, nodding her head towards Baz’s usual table. There, Baz and Isaac are seated close together, almost pressed together. I didn’t even notice them come in.

Isaac has a smile on his face and is giving Baz soft looks. Baz isn’t exactly smiling, but he has a pleasant expression on his face, which is the closest look to happiness Baz gives in public. I’m pretty sure the look on his is directed towards Isaac.

Watching them be all nice together is making me feel sort of ill, so I look away. I turn back to Penny and clear my throat. “Well just ‘cause they’re sitting together doesn’t mean they’re dating.”

Penny gives me a skeptical look. “Okay, then. Still, even if they’re not dating, Isaac is Baz’s friend and you should still avoid talking bad about him if you want to make up with Baz.” 

“You’re right,” I tell her, because she is. I needed to apologize to Baz. I didn’t want to go back to fighting. 

I hear laughter coming from Baz’s table and I turn back to look at them again. Isaac is grinning at Baz, and Baz is now looking at him with a small smile. Baz smiling shouldn’t be such a big deal, but it is. He doesn’t ever smile at anyone. At least, he never smiles at anyone around me.

I swallow the lump in my throat and force myself to look away from them again.

When I look at Penny again, she has this pitying look on her face that I don’t really understand. She pats my hand and just says, “it’ll be alright, Simon.”

**Baz **

I did actually have the chance to meet up with Isaac before breakfast. 

We had a quick snog before we made our way to breakfast. Isaac has one of those roommates that only uses their room for sleeping, so we had his room to do whatever we pleased. 

At breakfast, I felt Snow look at me a few times, but I never looked at him. I didn’t want to see the same look of disgust on his face like last night. Instead, I slipped my hand into Isaac’s under the table and focused on him. 

Dev and Niall haven’t said anything about my sudden closeness with Isaac. Which isn’t really surprising, considering they don’t even know that I’m gay. I doubt that they’ll suspect I’m with Isaac unless we’re caught kissing.

Afterwards, we went to the library. Isaac had to do some revisions, and I offered to help him. I didn’t have much to do today, besides avoiding Snow. 

So I sat with Isaac in the library, once again holding hands under the table, and helped him with his studies.

Eventually Isaac had to leave to meet up with some friends. Before he left though, he did a quick scan of the library (which was empty), and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek. 

“I’ll see you later then,” he said. I just nodded, still a bit fazed from the kiss. I'm not used to causal affection. It’s a bit odd really, I don’t know how to react to it. 

Isaac throws me one last smile before leaving.

I decide to stick around in the library to catch up on some light reading.

Unfortunately I didn't get to read much before Snow decided to disturb me.

“Baz,” he said as he sat down across the table from me.

“Snow.” I sneered. “To what do I owe this pleasure?”

“Hi. How are you?” He asked, his voice a bit too loud. He fumbled with his hands as he talked and wasn’t keeping eye contact with me.

“Did you just stop by to exchange pleasantries? Or is there another reason why you’ve come to disturb me?”

“Um. I just- I wanted to apologize. About last night,” he said, his voice still too loud. 

That’s not what I was expecting. I thought that the next time I would be forced to talk to Snow he would keep pushing me to tell him about Isaac. 

“Get up,” I say. He looks up at me confused.

“Why?” He questioned, but still stood up.

“Because if we’re going to talk we should go somewhere more private. I don’t want anyone to overhear our conversations, and you don’t know how to talk quietly.”

He gives me an offended look. “I was just whispering.”

“Please,” I say, guiding us towards the exit. “Your whispers are basically screams.” Snow glares at me but says nothing.

We walk in silence for a bit before Snow speaks up again. “Are we just going to our room?”

“Well that’s where we have the most privacy, so yes.”

When we get up to our room, I sit down at my desk chair. Snow remains standing and stares at me, like he forgot what he was going to say.

“You can begin your groveling now.” I say to him. He scowls down at me.

“I said I was going to apologize, not grovel.”

“Same difference,” I say dismissively. 

“Look. I’m sorry about last night. I shouldn’t have kept asking you those questions. I’m not gonna bother you about Isaac, even if he’s your boyfriend or whatever.” He says the last part through gritted teeth. 

I stay quiet for a moment, partly because I don’t know what to say, and partly because I want to keep him on edge. 

“I was really hoping to hear some groveling, but I suppose that apology will do.” Snow rolled his eyes at me. 

“So you forgive me? We can go back to normal now, yeah?”

“Sure, Snow, we can go back to tolerating each other.” He grinned at me. “I just have a question though.”

“What?”

“What do you have against Isaac? Why couldn’t you just have minded your own business and left him and me alone?”

He breaks eye contact with me and shrugs. “I dunno. I guess it’s because I don’t really know anything about him. I didn’t know if he was trustworthy. But I guess it’s not my business,” he shrugged again. “Even if I don’t like or trust him you’ll still date him. You don’t really care for my opinions.”

I _ did _care for his opinions. I always do. That’s why I felt so shitty last night. But he can’t know that. 

“You’re right Snow, I don’t care for your opinions.”

“Yeah, you’ve made that clear, Baz.”

“To be honest, Snow,” I say. “I thought you didn’t like the idea of me dating Isaac because you were somewhat homophobic.” I don’t know why I’m telling him this. Is it because I seek his validation? That I want him to approve of me?

Snow’s eyes widen and he begins to sputter. “_ What? _ I- no. God no. I just- that’s- not true. How- no. I- don’t- don’t l-“

He’s gone into panic mode. I should probably stop him before he self-combusts. “Calm down, Snow. Take a breath and then use your words.”

He stops talking and takes a couple of deep breaths before opening his mouth again.

“I’m- I’m not homophobic. I don’t care if you’re dating a bloke. I just- I just didn’t know Isaac, okay? I said I was sorry for being pushy. I’m gonna leave you two alone now.”

I don’t know what to feel. I think I should be relieved that my roommate and the boy I’m in love with doesn’t hate this part of me. I think I should also be relieved that he’s no longer going to interrogate me about the only person I’ve wanted to be with besides him.

“Well,” I start. “I think you leaving me and Isaac alone will be beneficial to you as well as us. Now you’ll have more time to focus on your own relationship.”

Snow looked at me, puzzled. “What?”

“You know, your relationship with Wellbelove.”

“We broke up, Baz.”

“Yes, but you got back together.”

“No we didn’t?” He’s still giving me confused looks that make me want to punch him. How can he be oblivious? He thought that if him and Wellbelove kissed in the middle of a party, no one would notice?

“I saw you two at the party, Snow. You danced together and then I saw her kiss you.” He finally realizes what I’m talking about. 

“Oh. Well, we’re not back together. She told me she just wants to be friends.”

“But she kissed you.”

Snow shrugs. “Yeah, but that was just on the cheek. It was like a friendly kiss, y’know?”

“No, Snow, I don’t. I don’t go around kissing my friends.” 

He shrugs again. “Whatever. We’re just friends. That’s all she wants.”

“Is that what you want?” I don’t know why I’m asking him this. Of course he wants to be with Wellbelove. He’s only ever wanted her. After all, they’re meant to be. 

“I don’t know. I like being her friend. I don’t want to lose her again by asking her to date me.”

Oh. I don’t know what to say. I thought he was back with Wellbelove. I thought their future was sealed and Snow would love her forever. That there was no way that he would ever want me.

What the fuck am I saying? Even if he’s not with Wellbelove, he’ll _ never _be with me. I’m just his evil plotting roommate who he has a temporary truce with. Wellbelove or not, he still hates me. 

But you know who doesn’t? Isaac. I should go look for him now. I should wrap this conversation up and go to him.

“Well,” I say, standing up. “You could use the extra time that you use on me to focus on you studies. Merlin knows that you desperately need to catch up in class.

“Fuck off, he says, but there’s no animosity in his voice. 

“Well I’ll see you later then. I’m going to go spend time with Isaac,” I announced. I don’t know why I’m telling him this. I think it’s to prove to myself that I don’t need Snow because I have Isaac. “Oh, and to answer your question, we are dating.” 

“Oh,” he says flatly. 

“Yes. I'm only telling you this so you’re not shocked if I have him around our room. I hope you can keep that to yourself, though, and not tell it to everyone.”

“I won’t tell anyone. I promise.” I think he really means it.

“Good,” I say. I glance at him one last time before leaving. He gives me this honest, earnest look that makes my heart ache.

**Simon **

The next time I see Baz is at dinner. He’s sitting with Isaac again. I catch his eye and try to smile at him. I don’t know why I smile: I guess I’m trying to show him how okay I am with him dating Isaac, even though I’m not. 

He gives the briefest nod, before turning his attention back to Isaac. 

I don’t think he’s ever acknowledged me in public willingly since our truce started. I guess it’s a sign that things between us are really fine. 

“So, did you apologize to Baz?” Penny asks me. It’s just me and her at the table tonight. Agatha’s sitting with some girls that I’m not familiar with. 

“Yeah. I think we’re fine now.” 

“Great. Since that’s been settled, when do you guys want to meet up again?”

“I don’t know.” I shrug. “I’ll ask Baz later.”

“Alright.” Penny takes a bite of her pasta before speaking again. “Did Baz confirm if they’re dating?”

“Um, I'm still not sure.” I say, not looking at Penny. I don’t like lying to her, but I promised Baz I wouldn’t say anything. 

“Huh. Well I think they are.” Penny said, as she glanced at Baz’s table. 

“Maybe.”

* * *

Baz leaves dinner with Isaac. 

I don’t know where they went or what they were doing, and I had a feeling I wouldn’t want to know. Baz being with Isaac was bad enough, I didn’t need to know specifics. 

I still couldn’t figure out why Isaac bothered me. I just… didn’t like him. 

Baz still didn’t come back as I climbed into bed. Usually, when he was out this late, I was sure that he was in the Catacombs, draining rats.

Now, he could either be at the Catacombs or it was likely that he was with Isaac. His boyfriend. 

I hated that I didn’t know where he was for certain. I just wanted him back in our room, where I could keep an eye on him, where he was safe.

I needed to stop thinking about Baz. I don’t think it was normal to constantly think about your vampire roommate and his boyfriend. 

So I buried my face in a pillow and tried not to think about Baz as I fell asleep. 

(I failed.)

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys! i hope you enjoyed this chapter. i’m 99% sure that this fic will have 3 more chapters, so stay tuned, we’re getting close to the end. i really wanna finish this fic up asap. i’m finally done with school for the year, and i currently have no summer work to complete so i can really focus on writing. i wanna finish this fic before mid july. anyways, lemme know what you though of this chapter in the comments. :)


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas! Or at least, Merry Christmas to the students at Watford

**Simon**

It’s December 1st, meaning the Christmas season has officially started at Watford.

There’s Christmas decorations everywhere, and they put up the giant Christmas tree in the dining hall. Everyone’s in the Christmas mood, all cheery.

I didn’t feel too cheery though.

It’s been almost two weeks or so since Baz told me he’s with Isaac. It’s been two weeks of seeing him and Baz together, two weeks of me acting somewhat irrationally angry when I see them and Penny trying to calm me.

On top of that, we haven’t made much progress with our research. The only thing we discovered was that Baz’s mum had ended her life after being bit by vampires, which sort of sent Baz into a spiral. I tried calming him down, but he had brushed me off and told me that he had to go see Isaac. 

I hated the fact that he went to Isaac for comfort. It made my skin itch for some reason.

Sometimes when I stop by our room between things he’s there, on Baz’s bed. I haven’t caught them kissing again, but Isaac’s presence in our room alone puts me on edge. He always tries to be polite and nice to me, but every time we talk I snap at him. 

Baz and I never really talk about Isaac, which I guess is a good thing because I would probably say something shitty and we would fight.

I do talk about Baz and Isaac with Penny. Well, it’s more like I rant. She figured it out on her own that they were dating, so I didn’t break my promise to Baz. But I needed to talk about them with somebody, or else I would explode. Penny’s sick and tired of listening to me talk about them and she lets me know it too, with her constant eye rolls and scolds. Also, sometimes when I talk about them, she says the most cryptic things. One time she said to me, “You clearly feel strongly about their relationship. Do you think this is at all related to the same reasons why you’re so obsessed with him and want to check up on him constantly?”

I had no idea what the fuck that meant, so I just ignored her questions, and continued to talk about how I thought clingy Isaac was. I mean, what was the need to always be around him? Baz has other people in his life, and things to do. Isaac needed to let him have some time to himself. Maybe if he did, I could work more with Baz to solve his mum’s murder.

So, no I wasn’t exactly in the most cheery mood, unlike the rest of Watford.

**Penny**

Aleister Crowley, boys are so fucking stupid.

Specifically, Simon and Baz.

If they could just figure out their feelings, _ especially _Simon, I might be able to have a moment's rest. Everytime I sit down with Simon, he just wants to talk about Baz’s relationship.

I’ve tried to gently push him in the right direction, I've tried to suggest to him that his obsession with their relationship might be due to other reasons, but he’s so thick he’s not picking up any of the hints. 

And when they’re around each other they’re always bickering. But not the usual bickering that they used to do. No, now they bicker like an old married couple. There’s no true venom in their words, and usually their “bickering” turns into messing around and playful banter, and I’m forced to bring their attention back to the topic at hand.

I think Isaac’s noticed the change in relationship too. Simon and I don’t really spend time with Baz and Isaac (due to the fact that Simon dislikes Isaac because he fancies Baz), but once, when Isaac stopped by the library to meet up with Baz after we had finished working, he watched Simon and him engage in a conversation. Isaac looked a bit confused when he watched them (and a bit suspicious).

Baz and Simon were arguing about the Premier League and what team was best, or something along those lines. I honestly wasn’t paying attention, I was too busy organizing the notes we had made that day at the library. I didn’t even notice Isaac until he spoke up. 

“You know,” he said, and I finally looked at him. “I’ve always thought that Baz and Simon hated each other and couldn’t stand being around each other.”

“They usually can’t.” I said, but Isaac wasn’t looking at me. He was busy looking at Simon, who had just let out a laugh at something Baz had said. Baz was rolling his eyes. 

“Well,” Isaac said. “They look like they get along just fine.”

**Baz**

“You and Simon seem to be getting along a lot better.” Isaac said.

We were in his room, working on Magickal Words homework. We had been working in silence until Isaac spoke up.

“What?” I said.

“I was just saying that you and Simon are more friendly now.”

We were, but I didn’t know how he knew that. I still avoided Snow outside of our room as much as possible, so it wouldn’t raise suspicion. 

“We’re not friendly. He’s still an annoying prat.”

“Then why were you sitting with him in the library the other day?” 

Apparently, my plan to be discreet failed. It wasn’t even my fault, it was Snow’s. The idiot wanted to work in the library because he thought it was ‘boring’ to work in our room every time. I told him that people would find it odd that we would sit together in the library, but he insisted that nobody would care. 

Turns out I was right, as always. 

I can’t tell Isaac the truth about my mum, so I lie. 

“I was sitting alone in the library, until him and Bunce showed up. I didn’t want them to sit with me, but Snow doesn’t know how to accept no as an answer and decided to sit at my table against my wishes. I’m sure that he only sat there to irk me.” I had hoped that that lie would have been enough to put Isaac off, but he frowned.

“Yes, but, you two were talking when I got there. Not arguing, but talking civilly.”

I pressed my lips together tightly. “I was just being polite. If I started arguing with him in the library or insulted him like I wanted to, he would have gone off and burned down the library.”

Isaac still didn’t look fully convinced.

“Look,” I said. “Snow and I will never be friends, or anything close to that. Trust me.” _ Even though I desperately wanted to be his friend and more. _“It’s somewhat hysterical that you think Snow and I would ever be ‘friendly.’” I smirked at him, to try and hide how unnerved I felt. 

It seemed to have worked, because Isaac nodded and let out a huff of laughter. “You’re right, it does sound stupid. I just thought it was incredibly weird to see you two together.”

“You were understandably concerned, I promise.” I said. He smiled and reached out to squeeze my hand.

He seemed to have been convinced by my lies and moved back to his work. “Can you help me with #12?”

I nodded and shifted closer to him.

**Simon**

The next time we meet up to work together we’re back in our room.

I wanted to do work in the library again, but Baz refused to. He said that it was too risqué, and that once was enough. 

We once again don’t make much progress. We still don’t know who Nicodemus is, and we don’t have any clues about him either. There’s no trace of him in any of the library books that we searched, and we searched extensively. Baz is clearly frustrated, shown by how shitty he was being. He was constantly throwing jabs at me, and it took all of my willpower not to fight back.

After Penny left for the day, Baz turned to me and said, “Tell me about my mother’s Visiting again.”

“Why?” I said through a mouthful full of mint aero. Baz has chucked one at my head after I complained about being hungry. It had hit me right in the face, but I was still grateful for the snack.

“Because maybe recalling it will give us more clues about Nicodemus.”

“Fine.” I said. I finished the chocolate bar and retold the Visiting.

Baz took notes as I spoke. Once I was done, he said, “Again.”

“I don’t think repeating it again will do anything-“

“Don’t argue with me, Snow,” he snapped. “Just do as I say.” I let out a huff and repeated myself. 

He took notes this time too, and once I was finished he said, “Again.”

I groaned. “I already told you everything twice. There’s no point in repeating myself _ again. _” 

“Maybe you left out a detail. Just tell me about the Visiting again.”

“I didn’t leave out any details, I told you everything that happened during the Visiting already.”

“Well maybe you’ve forgotten something. It wouldn’t be surprising, considering how small your brain is. It really must be hard for you to retain any information.” I had been trying to keep my calm today, but he was being a downright prick.

“Well maybe if you were here when she came, I wouldn’t have to keep repeating myself. It’s not my fault that you missed the Visiting.” I growled.

Baz’s nostrils flared and he sneered at me. “And you think it’s _ my _fault I missed the Visiting? You don’t think I wanted to see my mother?” He shouted.

“I don’t fucking know!” I shouted back. “You refuse to tell me where you were. Even after the time we’ve spent working together you haven’t told me shit.”

“I don’t owe you anything, Snow.” He sneered.

I threw my hand up in frustration. “It’s not- It’s not about owning me anything. I just want to know where you were, okay? It drove me crazy not knowing where you were, and I still don’t know.”

Baz didn’t say anything for a moment, instead he just glared at me. Then, he said, “Fine.”

“What’d you mean, ‘fine?’”

“I mean I’ll tell you where I was for the first few weeks of schools.” It wasn’t just a few weeks, but I don’t say that.

“Really?” 

“Are you suffering from hearing loss? Didn’t I just say I would?” He snapped. I growl again, but don’t throw back any insults.

“Okay, tell me then.” Baz sighs, and gets up from where he was seating at his desk and sits on his bed. I sit on my own, and stare at him. 

“I was kidnapped. By numpties.” He says casually, as if being _ kidnapped _is just a minor inconvenience rather than huge fucking deal.

“You were- _ what _?” I croak out. I realize I’ve stood up and moved closer to Baz. 

“Yes, Snow, I was kidnapped by numpties. It’s all quite embarrassing, so you can see why I didn’t want to talk about it.” Baz is saying everything so nonchalantly that it makes me want to scream. 

“Why- why are you acting so casual? What the fuck, Baz? Are you okay?” I've sat down on his bed now, right next to him. 

He’s not looking at me, and instead stares right at my bed. He rolls his eyes. “It happened weeks ago, I’m perfectly fine now.” How can he be fine? He wasn’t fine when he got here. He was limping, and he looked sickly. He still has a small limp, I think he thinks that I’ve forgotten about it but I haven’t. 

“How can you be fine? You still have limp, Baz. Did they- did they hurt you?” As I say it, I can feel myself getting angry. If they hurt Baz, I swear to _ fuck _I will kill whoever did it. 

Baz shrugged. “Not on purpose. But locking someone in a coffin for 6 weeks can have its effects.” He said, letting out a bitter laugh. Fuck. All this time, I thought he was plotting during his time away from Watford. I didn’t know that he was getting hurt, that he was being held in a fucking_ coffin. _Guilt pools in my stomach. 

“Why did they keep you in a coffin, Baz?” I say quietly. He finally looks away from my bed and glares at me. 

“Why do you think, Snow? You should know why.” The look he’s giving me feels like a confirmation of something I’ve known for a long time. That he’s- he’s a-

I realize that I don’t care. That piece of information doesn’t matter to me, considering everything else he’s just told me. I couldn’t care less about what he was, I just wanted him to be okay and safe. 

“Do you know why they took you?” I say. 

“They left a ransom note, but Pitches don’t pay ransoms. My family doesn’t think that the numpties had any personal agenda, rather they were hired by someone to kidnap me.” 

“Well we’re going to find whoever did it, Baz. Okay?” I placed my hand on his shoulder. I thought he would shove me off, but he didn't. 

Baz sighed. “Snow, don’t worry. It’s not your problem-“

“_ Yes _, yes it is. You were kept in a fucking coffin, Baz. I’m going to find whoever did it and make them suffer for what they did to you.” Nobody gets to hurt Baz and get away with it. If anyone ever lays another hand on Baz again, I will destroy them.

“Calm down, Snow, your magick is leaking.” I hadn’t noticed, but I pull it back in before anything happened. “If you really want to find my kidnapper, you can.”

“Good.” I say. “We can’t just let them get away with it.” 

“I don’t understand why you care so much.” 

How could I not care? I was worried sick about him, while he was gone. He was the only thing I could think about. It drove me crazy not knowing where he was. I just wanted to see him again, so badly. I just wanted him across from me in our room, where no one can touch him. Where I could watch over him, and know where he was at all times. 

And now, now that I know that he was kidnapped? That he was hurt? There was no fucking way he was ever going to leave my sight again. No one was ever going to hurt him again. I was going to keep him safe forever. I was never letting him go. It’s going to be me and Baz. It’s always going to be me and Baz.

I want him with me all the time. I want him safe and unharmed. I just- I want _ him. _

Fuck. _ Fuck. _It all comes crashing down, and everything starts to make sense. Why I didn’t like Isaac. Why seeing them together made me feel horrible. Why when I saw them kiss, I wanted to break something; why it felt like I couldn’t move. 

I don’t know how I didn’t realize it before. Maybe it’s because I’ve felt this way for so long that I didn’t even notice. 

What am I supposed to do now? He’s with someone else, and he doesn’t even like me, let alone return my feelings. It feels like my heart is going to explode with the overwhelming emotions I'm feeling right now. 

I realize I haven’t answered his question, and he’s staring at me expectantly. I open my mouth and nothing comes out. He raises an eyebrow like he’s saying _ get on with it, Snow. _

“Because- um- it’s the right thing to do.”

Baz snorts, and shakes his head. “Ever the hero, Snow,” he teases. I smile weakly. 

I realize my hand is still on his shoulder, and quickly remove it. Touching him was a bad idea. It’s gonna hurt me now that I figured out my feelings. 

I have to leave the room. I think if I spend another minute with him alone I was going to blurt out everything that I felt. 

“Well- I gotta- I'm going to go see Penny,” I say, quickly standing up. 

“Alright. Don’t tell her what I just told you.” He says carefully. I nod.

“I won’t.” I make my way to the door. Before I leave I turn to him and throw him another weak smile. “Bye Baz.”

He raises an infuriating eyebrow and smirks at me. “Bye, Snow.” Merlin, he’s so gorgeous it makes me mad. 

Fuck. I really have to talk to Penny.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it finally happened, simon finally figured out his feelings. (yay lmao) i think I might have made simon more oblivious than usual in this fic, but it was needed for the plot. im writing a lot more now that i have no school (as seen by how this chapter only came out a few days after the last compared to all the other chapters that took me months lmao) so i really think im gonna be done with this fic soon, which is a good thing. lemme know what you think of the chapter in the comments!


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hey guys! i’m uploading this chapter later than i wanted, but that’s because this ended up being my longest chapter, so i hope this mess of achapter that is 7k words makes up for it.   
ps: baz is a bit ooc, sorry about that

**Baz**

Snow’s avoiding me. 

For the past week, everytime I tried talking to him, he turned red and could barely let out a sentence before running away. 

His odd behavior started after I told him about the kidnapping. I’m almost certain it’s because I've confirmed his biggest theory: that I’m a vampire. 

I wonder if he’s told the Mage yet. Maybe that’s why he’s avoiding me. Maybe he feels guilty for turning me in. 

I really shouldn’t have admitted that I was a vampire. But in the moment, with Snow touching me and looking at me with concern and worry, I couldn’t stop myself. 

Crowley, he must be disgusted with me. That must be another reason why he’s avoiding me. He can’t stand the sight of a monster like me. 

_ Can you blame him?  _ I ask myself.  _ You often can’t stand the sight of yourself. _

I use Isaac to push Snow out of my head. I spend most of my days with him, and let him push me further into his bed as he snogs me. Sometimes, when we’re kissing I think of Simon, and imagine how it would feel if it was him that I was kissing instead. I always immediately feel guilty afterwards, but I can’t help my thoughts. I’ll always want Simon no matter what.

* * *

Snow might be avoiding me, but his sidekick is clearly not. 

Bunce makes that clear when she decides to interrupt Isaac and me in the dining hall one day mid afternoon. I have to stop myself mid conversation when she slides into the seat across me. 

“I need to speak to you,” Bunce announces. She then turns to Isaac and says not unkindly, “Isaac, can you give us a moment?” 

Isaac starts to get up, but I stop him. “You shouldn’t be forced to leave just because Bunce here decided that everyone must listen to her incessant orders,” I tell Isaac. Bunce glares at me. 

“I just need to talk to you for a quick minute, Baz, and I think both of us would want to talk about this topic privately.” She gives me a knowing look that makes me clench my jaw. Isaac clearly notices the tension in my body, and starts to get up again.

“It’s fine. I wanted to go grab some biscuits, so I was going to get up anyway.” He gave me a quick encouraging smile before he left. 

I turn to Bunce and sneer at her. “What do you want, Bunce?” 

“Why haven’t we met up to do research in a week?” 

She should know why we haven’t had a meeting. Snow would have told her that I’m a vampire. He’s been telling her for years that I’m a vampire, and now he finally had the confession. I didn’t know why Bunce was pretending that she didn’t know. 

“I don’t know Bunce, why haven’t we had a meeting?” I snapped. Bunce looked at me like I was an idiot. 

“ _ I _ don’t know. That’s why I came to you. You’re sort of the main reason we’re doing this investigation after all, so it’s usually up to you to decide when we meet,” Bunce said matter of factly. 

Maybe she really didn’t know. Why hadn’t Snow told her? For a second I think it might be because we were friendly now and he didn’t want to out me like that, but that didn’t make sense. I knew we were closer now because of our truce, but the way he was avoiding me told me that he didn’t care about the progress we made in our relationship, that I would always be seen as a monster. He should have told everyone that I was a vampire by now. 

“I suppose it  _ is  _ up to me to schedule the meetings. Fine. We’ll meet tomorrow at 3,” I say. “Tell Snow.” Bunce raised an eyebrow at me.

“Why should I be the one to tell him?”

“Because I don’t feel like having a conversation with that twit. Is it that hard for you to tell him something that simple, Bunce?” Bunce rolled her eyes at my aggression. 

“Fine, I’ll tell him. You don’t have to always be so dramatic, Basil.” I could see Isaac making his way back to our table. 

“Thank you for the wonderful advice, Bunce. You can leave now.” She got up and brushed down her skirt. 

“I'll see you later then. Bye, Basil.”

**Penny **

Simon doesn't know that I went to talk to Baz. He’s been avoiding him since last week, ever since he finally realized how he felt (or as I like to call it, “The Revelation”). 

He threw rocks at my window that day, and told me to meet him in the library. I was in the middle of doing my homework and was annoyed when he wanted to meet up, but the expression on his face told me whatever he wanted to talk about was important. 

There, in the library, Simon confessed to me that he had finally realized that he liked that Baz. Then he told me that that was probably the reason why Isaac annoyed him so much (which was something I already knew).

He spent the next twenty minutes ranting about Baz and how he couldn’t believe that he didn’t realize any of this before. He kept tugging on his hair while he talked and by the end of his rant his hair looked like a rat’s nest.

Then his eyes widened, and he said to me, “What do I do, Penny?”

“About what, Si?” 

“About-about Baz! I almost told him how I felt when I saw him. I feel like if I see him again I’m just gonna accidentally confess my feelings to him.” 

Simon seemed like he was in real distress, but I didn’t know how to help him stay quiet. He was terrible at keeping secrets. There might be a spell that could help him, but I didn’t have time to look for it now. “May you should just try not to spend too much time with him for now,” I advised. 

Simon groaned. “I share a room with him. It’s gonna be hard to not spend time with him if I live with him.” 

“I know, but you don’t have many options right now.” I said. He nodded. 

“You’re right. I’m just gonna have to try my best.” He had said. 

Now, for the past week, Simon had been basically running away when he saw Baz. He was also acting mopey. Whenever he saw Baz and Isaac together he would immediately deflate, and didn’t talk much. When he would talk, it would be about how brilliant Baz was and how maddening it was to share a room with someone so fit.

It was driving me insane.

I sympathize with Simon, I really do, but I also really hated this sad lovesick version of him. I swear to Merlin, he was going to start to recite poetry about Baz’s eyes. 

I had this gut feeling that Baz liked Simon too. Yes, I know Baz had a boyfriend (they were trying to be discreet about it, but I saw Isaac kissing Baz on the cheek one night after dinner when they thought no one saw them), but there had always been this thing between him and Simon. 

So maybe if they spent time together, they’ll realize it. And if they didn’t work out, Simon still needed to learn to be around Baz with his feelings. 

So now you see why I went behind Simon’s back to see Baz and plan a meeting. It was for his own good. 

**Simon **

“We’re going to meet in your room for research tomorrow afternoon,” Penny says 

I look up from my Elocution assignment that I’m struggling with to look at Penny. “What- when did- since when?” 

“I talked to Baz. It’s been more than a week since we last met up. We agreed that tomorrow would be a good time to regroup.” 

“But- _ Penny, _ ” I hiss. “You know I can’t be around Baz. What am I supposed to do tomorrow?” 

Penny sighs. “Simon, I know it’s hard being around Baz, but you were going to have to face him eventually. After all, were you just going to stop helping Baz with his mum just because you can’t control your feelings?”

“No,” I protest. “But I just- I just. I don’t know. I don’t know how to be around him. It’s too weird to spend time with him.” 

It  _ is  _ weird around him. Whenever I see him, I just want to tell him how I feel, and kiss him. I want nothing more than to spend time with Baz, but I want to spend time with him as his boyfriend, not as his annoying roommate that he’s been forced to get along with. 

“Well, I think if you start to spend time around him, it’ll become less ‘weird,’” Penny says.

“I guess,” I mumble.

“I promise everything will go smoothly tomorrow. I’ll be there with you, so it won’t be that terrible.” 

“If you say so.” I’m still not too keen on the idea of spending time with Baz, but I don’t think I really have a choice. We haven’t even found Nicodemus yet, or any other clues about his mother’s killer. Baz and I are going to have to work together, no matter how hard it’s going to be for me to hide my feelings. I promised him that I would help him. 

I’m just gonna have to shove my feelings down. It has to be one of the things that I don’t think about, even though it's always been impossible for me to stop thinking about Baz, even more so now. Merlin, I really wished I hadn’t figured out my attraction to him. I think I’ve been oblivious to my own feelings for years, couldn’t I have just continued to be oblivious? 

* * *

**Baz**

It’s 3:05, and Bunce and Snow are still not here.

I’ve grabbed some scones from the kitchen for Snow. I knew if there wasn’t any food for him he wasn’t going to be able to focus. 

It takes the two of them another five minutes to arrive.

“Sorry we’re late,” Bunce says as she enters the room. Snow trailed in behind her, not looking at me. “We went to the library to grab all the newspapers we can find from August of the year your mum died.”

“It’s fine,” I reply, and take the pile of newspapers from Bunce. I put them on my desk, next to the plate of scones that Snow is eyeing. “You can have one. I haven’t poisoned them.” Snow finally looks at me and flushes. 

“I- um. Thanks,” he says and grabs a scone.

“So what I was thinking was that we sort through these newspapers for any information about Nicodemus, and any other useful information.” Bunce says. She plucks one of the newspapers up from the pile and flips it open. “The vampire attack was a significant event, and they reported it for weeks afterwards. Look,” she pointed at the date of the newspaper. “This paper is from 3 weeks after the event, and there’s a whole page dedicated to the attack.” 

“Sounds like a good plan,” Snow says with a mouthful of scone. I should be disgusted, yet I find it endearing. 

“Let’s split the pile then.” I say. “There’s nine newspapers, so we each have three to work on.” 

“I think 30-45 minutes is enough time to dissect the newspapers, don’t you two?” Bunce asks.

“Sure.” I say, and Snow simply nods. 

“Well then,” she says. “We should start working.”

* * *

There’s not much details about the attack itself in the newspapers I have. It’s more about the aftermath. They talk about the Mage’s acceptance of the new headmaster’s position and the funeral. 

When I read about my mother’s funeral, I’m surprised by the details. I was there, of course, but I don’t remember anything. It's like my mind has blocked the attack and what happened afterwards. The only thing I vaguely remember is Father and Fiona fretting after me when I was bitten. 

“It’s been almost an hour, and I still haven’t found anything that seems that important,” Snow complains from his bed, which is scattered with the newspapers. “They talk about the vampires and their identities, but I don’t think that’s helpful because they all died that day.”

Bunce sighs. “I haven’t found anything that we don’t already know. Baz?” 

“There’s nothing of significance in my newspapers,” I say, and Snow groans. 

“How is it possible that we haven’t found any information about Nicodemus? There’s information about everyone in the magick community,” Bunce says. 

I sigh and lean back my chair. Bunce is right. You could look up information about every mage in the community. It wasn’t hard to keep track, it wasn’t like there were tons of us. Except- maybe- maybe we couldn’t find any information about Nicodemus because he wasn’t one of us.

“You’re right, Bunce. It’s easy to find information in the magickal community. About  _ mages.”  _

She narrows her eyes at me. “Are you implying that Nicodemus isn’t mage?” 

“Well why else can’t we find information about him?” 

She didn’t say anything for a moment. She looked a bit lost in thought as she tapped her fingernails against Snow’s desk. Then, she said, “I suppose it makes sense that Nicodemus isn’t a mage.” Her eyes widened. “Merlin, what if he’s one of the vampires?”

“He can’t be.” Snow interrupts. “I mean- all the vampires from the attack are dead, and there’s no mention of a vampire named Nicodemus from the attack.” 

“Well, maybe he wasn’t at the attack. Maybe my mother told us to go after him because he might know information about the other vampires, or who the killer is.” I say. It finally feels like we’re connecting some of the dots. 

“Well maybe, but we still don’t have actual information about him, do we? Like where do we go to find him?” Snow retorts. Since when did Snow become the voice of reason? 

We sit in silence, trying to think of ways to find him. An idea comes to me. “Well there’s a high chance we can’t find anything on Nicodemus because of how limited the library resources have become.”

Bunce nods in agreement with me. “That’s very possible.”

“And it’s all the Mage’s fault. Ever since his tyrannical rule started he’s done everything to censor the library. He enjoys exploiting his power, just to prove he has it.”

“Hey!” Snow snaps. I think it’s the first time in a week that he hasn’t backed down from an argument with me. I hide my delight and raise an eyebrow at him instead. 

“I’m not wrong Snow.” Before he has a chance to reply I say, “Our sources might be limited here, but it’s not the only place where we can find information.”

“Where else do you think we should go for clues?” Bunce asks.

“Well, Christmas holiday begins in about two weeks. I have an extensive library at home, and I’m sure that you might have some books at your house that could help us out too, Bunce.”

“I should, unless the Mage took them during his raid.”

“Yet another example of the Mage’s exploitation and abuse of power.” I mutter under my breath. Snow glares at me.

“If he took anything, it would be for a good reason. It’s not like he’s some evil dictator.”

I let out a snicker at that. The Mage  _ was  _ a dictator by all definition, but Snow refuses to admit it. “Sure, Snow. Whatever helps you sleep at night.”

“Anyways,” Bunce interrupts. “I think we can all agree that our best chance of finding information on Nicodemus is over Christmas break.” 

“So are we not gonna do any research till after the holiday?” Snow asks.

“We can, but I dont think we’ll find much more information at Watford.” I answer. 

“Right, so I think we’re done for the day, wouldn’t you two agree?” Bunce asks. 

“Yes, I think we should wrap this up,” I say and stand up. Bunce stands too, and picks up her pile of newspapers. 

“I’ll return these to the library, since they’re not useful.” She goes over to Snow’s bed and refolds the scattered newspapers, and then grabs mine from my desk. She makes her way towards the door before Snow stops her.

“D’you need help carrying them there, Penny?” Snow rushes to her side and reaches for them, but Bunce leans away from him. 

“It’s just newspapers, Simon. They’re not heavy.”

“But-“

“You can stay here. I’m more than capable of carrying a few newspapers.” She holds the newspapers under one arm, and opens the door with the other. “I’ll see you later, Simon. Bye, Baz.” 

“Goodbye, Bunce.” The door clicks behind her, and Snow and I are left standing in silence. 

He looks like he wants to bolt out of here, but he can’t leave without it looking suspicious, so he stays standing in the middle of the room, occasionally shuffling his feet. I don’t know what to say to him. We haven’t spoken properly in a week, and you can feel the awkwardness in the room. 

I decide to put us both out of our misery. 

“You can leave, Snow.” He gives me a confused look and I sigh. “I know you want to, so just leave.” 

“I never- I didn’t say I wanted to leave.” I can’t help but roll my eyes.

“Well, it’s obvious that you do. Isn’t that what you’ve been doing this entire week? Leaving whenever you caught sight of me?” His eyes widen in surprise and his cheeks redden. Did he really think that I didn’t notice him avoiding me?

“I’m not- I haven’t- what makes you think-”

I stop his blubbering before it can escalate. “Snow, it’s fine. I know and understand why.” There’s suddenly a panicked expression on his face.”

“You-you do?” Does he think I’m an idiot? 

“Yes, Snow. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that you’ve been avoiding me ever since I admitted that I’m- that I’m-“ Fuck, I can’t even get myself to admit that I’m a vampire . Of course I understood why Snow was ignoring me. I couldn’t even stand the fact that I was a monster, and he shouldn’t either. 

He looks confused again. “I don’t know what you’re saying.”

“You’ve been avoiding me since I admitted that I’m a vampire!” I snap. Crowley, it’s hard to say it aloud. 

He finally realizes why I’m saying. For some reason, he looks relieved. “ _ Oh.  _ No. I haven’t been avoiding you because you’re a vampire.” He says simply, like it’s no big deal that his roommate is a bloodsucker. 

“That’s exactly why you’ve been avoiding me, Snow. There’s no need to lie.”

“No, that’s not true. I don’t care that you’re a vampire.” I scoff.

“You’ve been trying to prove for years that I’m a vampire, and suddenly you don’t care?” He shrugs.

“Nope, I don’t care.”

“I find that very hard to believe after all those years of accusations.” 

He sighs, and runs a hand through his hair. “Look, have you ever bitten a human?” He asks.

“I- never. I would  _ never  _ bite anyone,” I say forcefully, because he needs to know that I’m not that terrible.

“Right, that’s what I thought . So you really just eat animals, like rats and stuff, yeah?”

“Yes,” I say cautiously.

“So then I don’t care that you’re a vampire. As long as you just keep eating rats and not people, I’m fine with the vampire stuff. I’m not exactly a militant vegetarian.”

It’s unbelievable how casual he’s being about this. I’m just supposed to believe that he truly doesn’t care? If I really didn’t mind the vampire thing, why had he been ignoring me?

“Well, if you really don’t care that I’m a vampire-“ 

“I  _ don’t. _ ” He insisted. 

“- If you didn’t care,” I continued. “Why have you been avoiding me?”

He looks away from me and rubs his neck. “I haven’t been- I’ve just- I’ve just been- um, busy.” 

“Doing what?”

“I’ve been doing stuff for the Mage.” He mumbled.

I narrowed my eyes at him. He was lying. I was almost sure that the Mage wasn’t even at Watford. I was going to catch Snow in his lie. 

“What stuff?” I ask, trying to keep my tone light so he wouldn’t feel threatened. 

“It’s private. Can’t tell you.”  _ Liar.  _ I want to ask him more, but there’s a knock at the door. 

“Open it,” Snow says, and he looks grateful for the interruption. 

“I was going to,” I snapped. It turns out it was Isaac.

“Hey,” he said, smiling. “I thought we were supposed to meet at 4:30.”

Oh shit. I had forgotten that I promised to stop by his room in the afternoon.

“Sorry. I lost track of time. I was trying to finish some of my workload,” I lie smoothly. 

“It’s fine. We still have plenty of time before dinner.” I nod. There was still a few hours till dinner to do what we pleased (which meant that we were probably going to snog in his bed again). 

“Let me just my wand before we go,” I say, walking to my desk. 

“Sure,” he said, leaning against the doorway. “Hey, Simon,” I heard him say. “How are you?”

“Fine,” Snow says in the same clipped, irritated voice that he always used to address Isaac. I glance at him, and he’s glaring at Isaac. No matter how polite Issac was, Snow always acted like a prick towards him. I had no idea why, but I wasn’t about to ask him either.

“Let’s go,” I said, and Isaac straightened up again. “Bye, Snow.”

Snow stopped glaring, and his expression softened when he looked at me. “Bye, Baz,” he called as I left.

**Simon **

When Baz said that he “understood” why I was ignoring him, I thought he had realized how I felt about him. He was the cleverest person I knew, so I wouldn’t be surprised if he'd figured it out . 

Thank magick that he just thought I was avoiding him because he was a vampire. It was completely untrue though. I didn’t care that he was a vampire. He would never hurt a person, I know it. He was too good. 

I was glad that we got to have a private conversation; it proved that I could be around him without telling him everything. I had just wished we weren’t interrupted by his boyfriend. Everytime I see Isaac it reminds me that I don’t get to be with Baz, and that I don’t even have a chance with him. Not just because he’s with someone else; even if he wasn’t with Isaac, he wouldn’t want me. He just saw me as the Mage’s heir, and nothing else. 

Still, seeing Isaac puts me off even though Baz wouldn’t want me. He’s just- he’s always there. He sits with Baz in classes and at meals, and occupies Baz’s free time. Yes, I know that’s what you’re supposed to do when you’re in a relationship, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less when I see them together. I want to be the one who occupied all of Baz’s free time. 

I just wish I stood a chance with him, even if it was the smallest of chances. If I could hold his hand even once, I think I would be the happiest I’ve ever been (even though I want to do more than just hold his hand. I want to kiss him, and be able to touch him whenever I want, and to just call him my boyfriend).

Merlin, I still can’t believe that out of all the people I could have fallen for, I fell for Baz. Maybe this is the universe’s way of punishing me for following him around in fifth year. 

* * *

**Baz**

Isaac had been acting odd for the past two days. He was quieter than usual, and wasn’t very focused. 

I didn’t know what was wrong with him. I tried asking him, but he just changed the subject. Maybe he would tell me whatever was wrong with him when he was ready. 

On the bright side, Snow wasn’t actively avoiding me anymore. We didn’t talk much, but we exchanged pleasantries. I still couldn’t believe the fact that he was 100% okay with my vampirism, but Snow never showed any behavior that made it seem like he was afraid of me. Maybe he was being truthful when he told me he didn’t care. 

* * *

“It’s been weeks, Niall. You’ve tried wooing Alice for weeks and she still doesn’t want you. You need to move on,” Dev says exasperatedly. 

“I can’t just give up! I’m so close to winning her over,” Niall argued.

We’re at dinner, and Niall and Dev are arguing about Niall’s sorry attempts at flirting with Alice. I had honestly thought Niall had given up his chances with her after his failed flirting at the party, but apparently not. 

“Watching you flirt with her is depressing, and it’s not getting you anywhere,” Dev says, and turns his head to look at me and Isaac. “Will you two back me up?” 

Isaac is clearly not listening to conversation. He’s lost in thought and doesn’t hear Dev. He’s been lost in his own head all day. I wish he would tell me what was wrong. 

“I agree with Dev,” I tell Niall. “You need to move on. It’s pathetic how you still haven’t made any progress with her, and it’ll become even more pathetic if you continue to chase after her.”

Niall glares at me. “Fuck off. You’re all shitty friends. You should be supporting me, not beating me down.”

“We’re just trying to save your dignity, mate,” Dev says. 

“No, you lot just enjoy making fun of me.” 

Dev and Niall go back to arguing one on one and ignore Isaac and I, which is fine by me. It’s fun watching them argue. 

“Hey,” Isaac says. It’s the first thing he’s said during dinner. “Can we talk after dinner?” He looks nervous. 

“Sure,” I said. I had no idea what he wanted to talk about. Maybe he was finally going to tell me why he was acting odd. 

He smiled at me. He looked a bit relieved, but I could still see nervousness in his face. “Great. We can talk in my room.”

I nod. “Okay.” 

The walk to his room after dinner is filled with a tense silence. I try to think of something to say to break the tension, any lighthearted topic. For some reason, Isaac’s roommate comes to mind. I just can’t help but wonder why he's never in their room. I have never had to interact with him. I decide to voice my curiosity and see if it’ll ease the tension.

“Does your roommate not exist, Isaac?” He gives me a puzzling yet amused look. “It’s just odd that he’s literally never here. I’m starting to think he doesn’t exist, and he’s actually just a figment of your imagination.” 

Isaac let out a quiet laugh. “He just likes to spend a lot of time with his girlfriend. They’re practically attached at the hip. He’s real, I promise.” 

“If you say so.” He let out another laugh, and pushed open his door. 

He sits down on his bed and motions me to sit down next to him, so I do. All the tension that was momentarily dissolved was right back. He looked like he was going to tell me something serious. 

“Baz,” he said. 

I raised an eyebrow at him. “Isaac,” I said with the same tone he used. Even in times of seriousness I can’t help my mocking. 

He sighed. “I wanted to talk to you. About- about what this is. Us.”

I would have never guessed that this was what he wanted to talk about. I thought whatever was going on between us was nice. The way he was talking made it seem like there was a problem. “Oh.” 

“Yeah. We’ve been dating for the past few weeks, and it’s been great.”

“I agree.” 

He runs his hand through his hair. It reminds me of Snow, and how he also plays with his hair when nervous. (I should probably not be thinking about Snow right now, but I can't help that he occupied half of my thoughts.) 

“I really like you, Baz. And I know that we agreed that this relationship wasn’t going to be serious, and was going to be casual, but I want to properly date you. I know that you said that you fancied someone else, but I was hoping that you might have- you might have moved on. If you have, I would like to be exclusive with you.” 

Crowley, this is a fucking surprise. He’s watching me with a hopeful expression and I know that he wants me to tell him that I’m done with this other person, that him and I can be proper boyfriends. But I can’t. No matter how much time I spend with Isaac or how good it feels to be wanted by him, I will always be in love with Snow. I wish I could get over Snow and be with Isaac. It would make my life so much easier. Merlin, my father might even tolerate my relationship with him, considering he’s part of the Old Families. Unfortunately, I had no say over my feelings. My heart would always belong to Snow, and I can’t continue to lead on Isaac. 

“I’m sorry,” I say, and all the hope in Isaac’s face drops. Guilt is starting to set in my body. I’m a terrible person, and Isaac deserves better. “I wish I had no feelings for that person, but I do. I’m sorry for leading you on.”

Isaac smiles sadly at me. “No, it’s not your fault. You told me how you felt in the beginning. It was was stupid of me to assume you felt any differently.” 

“I wish I didn’t. If I didn’t have feelings for that person, I would want to be with you.” Isaac nodded and gave me an understanding smile. Even when I didn’t deserve it, he was kind to me. Merlin, I fucking hate that I hurt him. 

“I guess this is it then,” Isaac says. “I really liked dating you, Baz. I hope things work out between you and… whoever you fancy. Good luck with them.”

I bite down a bitter laugh. Things were never going to work out between Snow and I. Still, it was nice of Isaac to wish me luck. 

“Thank you. I’m sorry if I hurt you. I never wanted to do anything to cause you harm.” I started to get up, and Isaac got up with me. 

“It’s fine. Like I said, it’s not your fault.”

I’m about to leave his room when he calls out to me. “Wait.”

I turn back to look at him. He looks like he regrets calling out to me. “What is it?”

Isaac sighs and looks at his hands. “Nothing. I was going to ask you a question, but it’s incredibly stupid. Never mind, I’m sorry.” 

“It’s alright, you can ask me what you want.” After accidentally leading him on, the least I can do is answer a question for him.

“I was going to ask you who you fancied. I thought that it might be… nevermind.” He looked embarrassed. 

“Just tell me. I don’t care.” 

“I know it sounds absolutely insane, but for a second I thought you might have liked Simon.” He laughed and shook his head. “It’s ludicrous, I know. You two were just getting along so much better now. Still, it’s insane. Sorry for mentioning it.” 

I looked at him with disbelief before recomposing myself. (How could he have known? Was I letting myself slip up around Simon?) I forced out a laugh. “That  _ is  _ insane. I can’t believe you would ever think that.” 

He smiled sheepishly. “I know. I’m sorry. You can leave now, I won’t bother you with stupid questions anymore.” 

I let my expression soften a bit, to let him know that I wasn’t annoyed. “Goodbye, Isaac.”

“Bye, Baz.”

As I walk up to my room, the guilt inside of me starts rising. I couldn’t believe that I let Isaac develop feelings for me. I should have been more clear about how I felt about Snow. I used Isaac to distract myself from Snow, and didn’t properly consider him. Snow was right all those times he called me a monster. I was a shitty person who didn’t deserve to be in a relationship, and I certainly didn’t deserve anything else that was good. I hoped Isaac would find a bloke that wasn’t a selfish prick like me. 

By the time I got to my room, I was itching for a drink. I wanted to stop the guilt from building up anymore than it had. Snow wasn’t in our room, so I could really just get sloshed in our room without him annoying me. 

Fiona had given me a bottle of whiskey when she dropped me off at Watford. She had shoved it in my hands and said, “_after the shite_ _you’ve been through, you’re gonna need this._”

Tonight seemed like the perfect time to open the bottle. 

I dug the bottle out of my closet and took a large swig of the whiskey. 

**Simon **

After dinner, Penny forced me to go to the library to finish my Greek assignment when I told her I had forgotten to do it. She reminded me that I was already not doing well in Greek, and missing any more assignments wasn’t going to help my grade. 

Going to the library made me nearly miss curfew. I had to rush back to my room to get back in time. 

When I opened the door, I was greeted by a drunk Baz.

Well, I didn’t actually know if he was drunk. He was sitting in his bed, his head leaned against the wall with his eyes closed. He had a bottle of whiskey in his hand. But he didn’t even notice me come in, which he should have. After all, he has vampiric senses. Maybe the reason why he didn’t notice was because he was drunk and it was affecting his senses. 

“Baz,” I called out. He finally opened his eyes and squinted at me, like he was trying to figure out what he was looking at. 

“Snow,” he finally said. “You’re back.” I still couldn’t quite tell if he was drunk, so I decided to ask him. 

“Are you drunk?” 

He took a sip from the bottle before speaking. “Not yet.” Did he want to get drunk? The last time I saw him drunk was in 5th year, down in the Catacombs. He seemed quite depressed when I found him. Was he depressed now?” 

“Why are you drinking on a Tuesday night? Are you- are you depressed?” 

He let out a laugh, but it wasn’t a happy one. “No, Snow, I'm not ‘depressed’.”

“Then why?” 

He sighed. “If you  _ must  _ know, Isaac and I broke up and I’m not exactly happy about it. Thought drinking would help take the edge off.” 

“Oh.” 

I know I should be happy about this. And I was, for the most part. I wouldn’t have to see them together. I wouldn’t have to wonder if Baz was out with Isaac when he wasn’t in our room at night. But when Baz was with Isaac, he seemed happy. And really, I just wanted Baz to be happy, even if it wasn’t with me. He deserved to be happy after everything he’s been through. 

As I let my eyes run over him, I noticed he didn’t seem happy now, sitting in his bed, drinking by himself. 

Baz noticed me staring at him and raised an eyebrow. “What? Do you want some?” He raised his bottle in my direction as an offering.

“Um- I don’t know- it doesn’t seem like a good idea-“ 

“Come on, Snow, don’t leave me drinking alone. It’s pathetic if I do so.” 

“I- alright.” I climbed into his bed and sat next to him. I took the bottle from and took a swig and immediately started coughing. Baz laughed at me and took the bottle back. “Careful, Snow.”

“That’s- really fucking strong,” I coughed out. Baz let out another laugh that made my heart skip. It felt good to make him laugh. I would do anything to hear it again. 

We sat in silence for a bit, passing the bottle back and forth between us. When I remembered that we had classes in the morning, I stopped drinking. He tried giving me the bottle but I shook my head. “I’m alright, thanks.” He shrugged and continued drinking. 

I didn’t know what to say. I wanted to make sure if he was okay, but I didn’t know how. I mean I could just ask him, but there’s a chance he would just brush me off. I don’t think Baz enjoys discussing his feelings with me. Still, I wouldn’t be able to rest until I knew if he was okay, so I just asked him. 

“Are you alright, Baz?” My words make him stop mid-sip. He sighs before answering. 

“I’m fine, Snow. I’m doing great, really.” 

“Then why are you trying to get drunk?”

“I’m not trying to get drunk. Like I said, I’m just trying to take the edge off.” 

“Is it- is it because you’re sad? Cause of your break up?” 

He closes his eyes and leans his head against the wall again, and doesn’t say anything. Just when I’m sure he’s not gonna answer me he says, “I don’t think I’m sad, per say. I knew the relationship wasn’t going to last, but it was pleasant. It just felt good to date someone, and I guess I’ll miss that.” 

Baz might have said he wasn’t trying to get drunk, but I think he is. Sober Baz would have never told me any of that. 

“How did you know it wouldn’t last?” I said curiously.

“Because we both agreed that it wasn’t going to be serious and we would just have fun. That’s why I’m not sad, it’s not like we were in a committed, deep relationship.” 

“Oh, that makes sense.” I didn’t know that. I thought they really liked each other and would be together for a long time. It made sense. Everyone threw themselves at Baz, and if he had picked Isaac out of everyone, it must have meant that he really liked him. But I guess that was wrong. 

“Besides,” Baz says, except his voice is much quieter now. “Nothing good lasts for me. I don’t deserve it.” 

“That’s fucking stupid,” I snapped at him. Because it was. He deserved everything good, and he should know that. “You deserve good things.” 

He turned his face to look at me and raised an eyebrow. “Oh? Is that why you’ve called me a monster all those times? Why you call me evil? Because I’m a good person who deserves good things?” 

“Well I was wrong all those times, okay? I didn’t mean it. I didn’t really know you then.”

“And you know me now?”

“Well, yeah. I know you better now, and I know you’re not a monster. And I know you deserve good things.”

Baz opens his mouth, and I know he’s going to try to contradict me, so I stop him before he can. “I’m not gonna change my mind. Don’t try to argue with me, You deserve good things, now shut it.” 

He smirks at me, and an urge to kiss it off of him rises in me. I push it back down. “Fine, Snow, if you insist. I won’t argue with you. I already knew it was a lost cause, considering how stubborn you are.” 

“Good. Now, I can think you’ve had enough to drink. We have classes in the morning, remember?” I remind him. I didn’t want him to get anymore drunk. If he got any drunker, I think he was going to become even more self-deprecating. 

“Fine. I was just about to stop, Snow. I told you I wasn’t trying to get drunk.” 

“Sure,” I said. Baz put the cap back on the bottle and put it to the side. 

I think I should leave his bed now, but I didn’t want to. We were sitting with our shoulders pressed together, and he smelled really good (like cedar and bergamot) and really liked how good it felt being so close to him. Also, Baz wasn’t exactly telling me to move. He actually looked like he was about to fall asleep. He was being quiet, and when I glanced at him, his eyes were fluttering close, and it looked like he was trying to fight the sleep off. 

A few minutes later, I feel his head on my shoulder and I freeze completely. He must have actually fallen asleep, because there was no way he would have his head on my shoulder if he was awake . 

Now I really didn’t want to move. If I moved, he would probably wake up, and it would be awkward. He’s probably more likely to wake up at this moment if I move; I think he’s in a light sleep right now. maybe if I wait a bit longer I can leave without waking him up. 

So I sit there, listening to Baz’s breathing and enjoying being around him. I don’t think I’ll ever be this close to him again, so I soak up the moment. 

Eventually, when I’m sure that Baz is sound asleep, I gently push him onto his back and cover him with a blanket. He shifts a bit, and for a second I think he might be awake, but he doesn’t move again. 

I climb into my own bed, and fall asleep watching Baz peacefully sleep. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> one more chapter left! hopefully ill upload it by next week. i can’t believe im almost done with this fic, it’s been nearly a year since i started writing it. it feels weird being close to the end. anyways, let me know what you think of this chapter in the comments.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is my first fic. Please let me know if it’s any good. I would love you forever if you leave a comment.


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